QI have two team members who just can't get along. Their animosity is causing problems for the group, and I'm thinking one needs to move on for the good of the whole. Each has specific skills that we need. How do I begin to decide who goes and who stays?
AThe consequences of their failure to work together need to be made clear and then they need one last chance. At the same time, consider whether you're better off replacing both -- it's often easier to replace skills than to repair attitude.
The inner game
To manage this situation, remain calm and keep emotion out of it. If this isn't easy for you, take the time to notice your feelings -- anger, frustration or resentment -- and get them under control.
Then assess the situation as you would if you were outside the team. Map out the team dynamics, noting how the problem employees interact with the team. Pay attention to the conflict triggers and be more specific about the effects on the team as a whole.
What would success look like for each of the combatants? If they are struggling for dominance, what is it that they want? What aspects, if any, are reasonable, and what do they need to let go of?
Finally, determine whether you've managed the situation as fully as you should have. Many managers avoid the conflict involved in addressing this type of situation, letting it escalate out of control.
The outer game