Santa speaks! MOA’s jolliest St. Nick reveals how he deals with both the naughty and nice.

Santa Clauses don’t grant many interviews, especially this time of year when they’re busy making lists, checking them twice — and figuring out how to deal with a youngster who wants a platypus for Christmas.

But Santa Dan, who looks a lot like Mall of America senior vice president Dan Jasper, took time out from meeting fans at the MOA’s Candy Cane Institute to answer questions about his duties.

Warning: Those who want to preserve a sense of mystery about the holiday VIP may want to skip the rest of this piece and rewatch “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” instead.

Q: How did you become Santa?

A: It came out of the blue. About halfway through 2020, in the middle of COVID, they asked me if I wouldn’t mind growing a beard in case one of the Santas we had hired got sick. I hadn’t had a beard in 40 years, but I said, “Sure, why not?” I ended up doing 10 shifts that year and loved it. When I was growing up, I saw the traditional Santa as kind of a scary guy with a fake beard. It wasn’t a great experience. I have fun, make the kids laugh, pick on the dads, make memories. There are some people that look amazing, but if you’re not going to connect with the kids and their family, it’s not going to work.

Q: How do you handle a kid who asks for something outrageous, like a horse or world peace?

A: Regardless of what they ask for, I tell them that Santa brings something special every year and will do so this year, as well. It’s not a commitment. That way, parents have some leeway to give what they want, but it’s still going to be special.

Q: How do you handle a kid that’s scared of you?

A: I may have them sit in my chair or I may lie down on the floor. It’s all about meeting their expectation and tone. Some kids may be distracted by noise and need calming, so you speak slower and quieter. Other kids just want to be crazy and have fun, so I jump around with them. I’m Caffeinated Santa. There have been very few that I haven’t been able to win over.

Q: What about skeptics?

A: I love kids who test me. There was this girl who must have been 10 or 11. She wasn’t buying that I was Santa so she was asking questions only Santa would know, like how fast I travel. She said that since I go to Europe, I should know the capital of Poland. “That’s easy,” I said. “Kraków.” She pointed out that it was Warsaw. “Oh,” I told her. “I thought you meant the old-time one, back before 1596.” I don’t know why I remembered that. She was flabbergasted. The look on her face when she left said I must be the real deal.

Q: Who have been some memorable visitors?

A: There was one family about two or three years ago with three boys, probably 12, 14 and 16, all sharply dressed. They looked like Boy Scouts. Each one of them wanted a new snow shovel for Christmas. Turns out that the family shovels snow for people who can’t do it themselves, so what they were really asking for was a way to help others. My eyes were tearing up. It’s not all kids. Last year, I had three adult men come through on different days. They all appeared to be on the spectrum and just wanted to visit with Santa. Sometimes there are girls’ nights out where they’ve had too many holiday glasses of wine.

Q: Are there Santa groupies?

A: Actually, there are. Once or twice, they’ve been inappropriate. One year, a gentleman came in and appeared to be shooting something for YouTube. He did something inappropriate, and I told him he was on the naughty list and had to leave. But for the most part, people are respectful.

Q: What are kids asking for these days?

A: “Wicked” stuff is really big. Friendship bracelets are really hot, thanks to Taylor Swift. Disney princesses are always big. So is anything related to Harry Potter, Legos, Bluey, Spider-Man. Kids talk about Elf on the Shelf all the time. The tough thing is when kids say someone they love is sick and they want Santa to make them better.

Q: How do you deal with that?

A: I ask them to leave. I’m kidding. That’s another case where you have to match their energy. You tell them that you’re sure they care about you and that love never leaves us.

Q: Who is your role model?

A: Buddy from “Elf.” He’s playful and innocent and looks for the best in people. I think this season is all about joy and believing that people are good. I shouldn’t tell you this, but you are on the nice list.

Q: You may want to check again.

A: I’d better recalibrate the machine.

The Minnesota Interview is a feature in which we dive deep into the personal side of public figures with special ties to our region and readers.