Writing a will? How to stop stalling and get it done

You know you should have a will, but you keep stalling. No one likes to think about dying or about someone else raising their children.

But if you get no further than scribbling notes or thinking about which lawyer to hire, you risk dying "intestate" — without a will that could guide your loved ones, head off family feuds and potentially save your family thousands of dollars.

Financial planners say getting people to stop procrastinating on this important money chore can be tough.

I asked several advisers to offer their best strategies for getting clients to get this done. Maybe one of these will help you.

Certified financial planner Katrina Soelter of Los Angeles suggests thinking of an estate plan as "the best love letter you can write to those you love."

Providing guidance on what you want to happen after your death — and who you want to care for minor children or pets — can be a huge gift to those you leave behind. You are also saving them the potentially large costs and delays of hiring attorneys to sort out your estate later.

Soelter said she procrastinated on her own estate planning and finds the positive approach works better than browbeating. "It doesn't help to heap more shame on them, but rather focus on the reasons why it is wonderful to get it done," Soelter said.

Financial planners often point out, for example, that without an estate plan a court could end up deciding who takes care of your children. State law determines who inherits your stuff, and the distribution may not be as you would want.

Janice Cackowski, a certified financial planner of Rocky River, Ohio, said one of her clients recently died after ignoring her advice to create a trust.

His will bequeathed his estate to his financially irresponsible son, with no restrictions.

"The money my client saved over his 63-year lifetime will be gone within 18 months of his death," Cackowski said.

CFP Kevin Gahagan of San Francisco noted that getting a basic estate plan in place may not be as complicated or expensive as you fear.

Also, think about what you would want to happen if you died in the next five years, rather than trying to create an estate plan that covers all eventualities, suggested Karen E. Van Voorhis, a certified financial planner in Norwell, Mass. You can always update and change things.

Many big companies offer their employees access to attorneys through prepaid legal services, said CFP Amy Shepard of Mesa, Ariz.

That is how she and her husband, Michael, created their estate plan.

They met with an attorney affiliated with the service, which cost less than $10 per biweekly pay period when he was employed by Wells Fargo.

"For most people, the biggest thing stopping them is money," Shepard said. "If their employer offers a legal benefit, it can make the process of doing an estate plan very affordable and very simple."

Affordable options for those who are not offered coverage through their employer may include online services such as Rocket Lawyer and LegalZoom, which are best for people with simple situations, such as those who don't have a lot of assets and who don't need trusts, Shepard said.

But users need to answer the sites' questions carefully and get the resulting documents notarized, or the paperwork won't be valid.

Van Voorhis also suggested making an appointment with an attorney now but scheduling it for a few months down the road.

"That way it's on the books and they'll feel like they've accomplished something, but they also don't have to face it for a while," she said.

Mike Giefer, a certified financial planner in Minneapolis recommends incremental deadlines.