On a recent Saturday that Rebecca Wolfe said she spent at home, she was strolling along the beach with a man she met on Hinge — but her mother doesn't need to know that.
Wolfe, 27, told her mom that she spent the evening watching movies with her roommate. In reality, the man she's seeing paid for her to take an Uber from her home in Queens to where he lives on Long Island. He cooked vegan Thai food, she said, and they spent time outdoors before she headed home.
Given that health experts emphasize keeping our distance from each other during the pandemic, Wolfe doesn't plan to tell her mother about any of it. Maybe she'll mention it after Thanksgiving, if things with the man keep going well.
"I'm still not fully sure how she would receive it," Wolfe said. "I think there's so many ways it could go, where she's either disappointed in me that I'm dating someone new during a pandemic, or she'd be really happy. But I think if I bring up, like, he Ubered me out to Long Island, she'd be like, 'That's crazy, why would you do that?' "
Everyone has different levels of risk tolerance, and opinions vary widely about what kinds of activities are acceptable right now: Is outdoor seating at a restaurant okay? What if we wear masks except when we're eating? How about if we're the only family there?
We all make our own choices. Many of us are just lying about them.
Angela Evans, a psychology professor at Brock University, sent a questionnaire to 451 adults in the spring to ask about their physical distancing practices, their potential symptoms of covid-19 and whether they have concealed any of it from others.
"We thought there would be relatively high rates of lying," Evans said. "But to be honest, the rates that we saw were much higher than we anticipated."