Jim Souhan: Vikings don't have Bears' QB woes

CHICAGO -- The history of Vikings' quarterbacks has teased and taunted Minnesotans since Fran Tarkenton became the host of "That's Incredible."

Tonight, a 40-year-old who skipped training camp will try to right his own and his team's December slump while being scrutinized on Monday Night Football because of his spat with the coach/chauffeur who talked him out of retirement.

That quarterback, Brett Favre, succeeded the odd duo of Tarvaris Jackson and Gus Frerotte, which succeeded Brad Johnson, who spent two stints with the Vikings but won a Super Bowl in Tampa. Johnson succeeded Daunte Culpepper, the phenom who forced his way out of Minnesota and into a series of failed tenures as an overmatched starter and an unhappy reserve.

Before Culpepper there was the talented but untrustworthy Jeff George, who succeeded the talented but untrustworthy Randall Cunningham, who succeeded the younger Johnson, who succeeded a series of mercenaries such as Warren Moon and Jim McMahon, who succeeded the underestimated Rich Gannon and the overestimated Sean Salisbury.

The Vikings' recent history features a list of talented quarterbacks, most of whom performed better elsewhere, and yet that list looks like a Hall of Fame induction ceremony compared to the Chicago dogs who have attempted to quarterback the Bears.

In Minnesota, Spergon Wynn is a punch line. In Chicago, he'd be the people's choice.

Monday Night Football will feature Favre vs. Jay Cutler at the marquee position in American sports, and that juxtaposition will prompt comparisons between the recklessness of both quarterbacks. This will be misguided, because Favre never has played as badly for an entire season as Cutler has in 2009, and the Vikings never have spent decades searching for one competent passer.

I witnessed Chicagoans' desperation in 2004. Backup journeyman Chad Hutchinson threw three touchdown passes to beat the Vikings at Soldier Field. The next day, the city's newspapers and talk shows asked how the Bears could have been so blind, to keep the great Hutchinson on the bench all season.

Hutchinson lost his next four starts while the Bears' offense averaged nine points a game. He never threw another pass in the NFL after that season.

Could you blame Bears fans for their desperation -- then, or when they dealt everything but Lake Shore Drive to Denver to land the talented if completely unlikable Cutler?

Bears fans can lament the absence of a great quarterback in their town since Sid Luckman, or the absence of a proven winner since McMahon.

A partial list of Bears "quarterbacks" includes Jim Harbaugh, Jim Miller, Bob Avellini, Erik Kramer, Rusty Lisch, Greg Landry, Mike Tomzcak, an ancient Dave Krieg, Moses Moreno, Shane Matthews, Kordell Stewart, Jonathan Quinn, Craig Krenzel, Peter Tom Willis, Doug Flutie, Rex Grossman, Chris Chandler, Steve Fuller, Will Furrer, St. Paul's Steve Walsh, Steve Stenstrom, Henry Burris, Rick Mirer, Cade McNown, Vince Evans and Hutchinson.

Taken as a whole, though, and considering the popularity of the Bears' brand across the country and the importance of the Bears in what might be the best sports town in America, that list makes you appreciate the proud history of Timberwolves centers.

This must be "The Curse of Bambi." Ever since Bears coach Mike Ditka tagged Flutie with that nickname, Bears' quarterbacks have looked like they were throwing games, not passes.

Tonight if Favre refuses to come out of the locker room because Soldier Field is too cold, or Favre and Childress thumb-wrestle for control of the franchise, or Jackson relieves Favre and evokes memories of Wynn, console yourselves with this thought:

The Vikings never tried to tell you that Rick Mirer was the answer.