As a middle and high school teacher and assistant principal, Susan Brostrom Romane had to administer tough love.
But her guidance was lopsided.
"She'd say 'OK, you messed up big, but now it's behind you and it's about moving forward and getting better.' She gave people great dignity and compassion," said Jana Hennen-Burr of Rogers, Romane's supervisor in the Elk River Public School District.
Romane died June 30 at age 54 after a three-year battle with cancer.
She taught English and occasionally let out a schoolmarmish scold — "Don't ever end a sentence with a preposition." But she was better known for firmly and lovingly guiding people to self-discovery.
"She guided me through a career decision by asking me 'What's scaring you from making this jump?' " said Romane's daughter-in-law, Monique Romane of St. Louis Park. "Then she'd build up your confidence and clarity. She saw things in you that you didn't see in yourself."
Romane's husband, Scott Romane of Maple Grove, said anyone who came in contact with her — by birth, neighborhood, school or marriage — "found themselves lovingly challenged to be more than they were when they first met her."
She was a striking, graceful and stylish figure who looked as if she were channeling Jackie O, and her graceful appearance conflicted with her sometimes plebeian advice. Family members recalled her dispensing bons mots such as "Beer pairs really well with eggs," "If you find yourself at Coney Island, you aren't doing things right until you've stuffed five hot dogs into your mouth" and "Believe it or not, underwear is always optional."