The problem: How can I get my husband to put the toilet seat down? I've stuck Post-it notes on the inside of the seat with a gentle reminder. I've verbally asked him countless times. Nothing works.

The low road: Well, you could plan a fake disaster in the middle of the night. Quietly sneak into the bathroom with some bottled water, empty it on the floor around the toilet, and shriek: "I've fallen and I can't get up!" Maybe then he'd listen. But I'm guessing that even without Post-it notes and verbal reminders, he's well aware of what he should be doing to be a good roommate/spouse/partner, and, for whatever reason, he just doesn't want to take the nanosecond to put the damn toilet seat down. This is less about potty training and far more about control and a desire to grab some back. Good grief. But, maybe work is getting to him. Maybe the request takes him back to a similar childhood admonishment. Who knows?

The high road: Take a deep breath and the high road. Put the seat down yourself. Then make the guest bathroom super-nice, and call it yours.

Gail Rosenblum is a features columnist. Please send questions about life's little quandaries to gail.rosenblum @startribune.com.