Dear Amy: Recently I was alarmed to see on Facebook that friends had attended a huge gathering where people were not following COVID safety guidelines.
I have been meeting with friends (only outside) this summer, but as the weather cools, I am wondering if it will be safe to have a few people over for, say, a game night.
Is there a polite way to ask potential invitees if they have been in any large, unmasked groups recently or should I just give up on a social life until a vaccine is available?
Amy says: It is wisest to stay up to date regarding CDC and your state and local guidelines, which frequently change.
Your question, however, is about how to ask people a very simple, common sense and straightforward question: "Have you been to any gatherings where you or others did not follow COVID safety guidelines and where you might possibly have been exposed to the virus?"
Given that people might qualify lying about this as a "social" or "little white lie," and given the quite irrational but human tendency to bend or dismiss the truth to avoid embarrassment, I don't think you can rationally expect a truthful answer from someone who violated medical recommendations.
In short, the person foolish enough to attend such an event and not voluntarily quarantine and be tested afterward is also more likely to lie about it later.
In my opinion, it is not wise to host an inside in-person game night or other gathering until you have the "all clear." Parlor games, especially, usually involve sitting close together, touching and sharing cards or game pieces, and excited exclamations.
