The job of determining stress levels in whales is itself apparently stressful. The most reliable information about tension lies in hormones most accurately measured by researchers boarding a boat, sidling up to a whale and waiting until it blasts snot out of its blowhole. By catching enough of it — or wiping it off their raincoats — scientists can run the gunk through chemical tests. However, a team of engineering researchers at Olin College in Needham, Mass., told the Boston Globe in September that they were on the verge of creating a radio-controlled, mucus-trapping drone that would bring greater civility to the researchers' job — and reduce the add-on stress the whales must feel at being stalked by motorboats.

First-world dilemmas

Ten parking spaces (of 150 to 200 square feet each) one flight below the street at the apartment building at 42 Crosby St. in New York City have been offered for sale by the developer for $1 million each — nearly five times the median U.S. price for an entire home. ... New York City plastic surgeon Dr. Matthew Schulman told ABC News in September of an uptick in women's calf liposuction procedures — because of ladies' frustration at not being able to squeeze into the latest must-have boots. The surgery is tricky because of the lack of calf fat, and recovery time of up to 10 months means surgery now will not help the fashion plates until next fall.

Order in the court

Signs went up in August in the York, Pa., courtroom of District Judge Ronald Haskell Jr. addressing two unconventional problems. First, "Pajamas are not [underlining 'not'] appropriate attire for District Court." Second, "Money from undergarments will not be accepted in this office." Another judge, Scott Laird, told the York Daily Record that he'd probably take the skivvy-stored money anyway. "The bottom line is, if someone's there to pay a fine, I don't see how you can turn that away."

Compelling explanations

Habitual petty offender Todd Bontrager, 47, charged with trespassing for probing various locked doors at a church in Broward County, Fla., in August, admitted skirting the law a few times, but said it was only "to study." "Incarceration improves your concentration abilities," he told skeptical Judge John "Jay" Hurley, who promptly ordered him jailed to, he said, help him "further concentrate."

American Matthew Miller, 24, told the Associated Press that he had a "wild ambition" when he entered North Korea in April that he wanted to experience prison life there in order to secretly investigate the country's human rights stance. In September, he was convicted of espionage in a 90-minute trial and will be conducting his investigation amid hard labor over a six-year period, beginning immediately.

The miracle of meth

Three terrified people screaming out of an upper-story window at a house outside Dothan, Ala., on Aug. 24 drew police in a hurry. They were trapped, they yelled — unable to escape because intruders were still inside, shooting at them. One "victim" said she had been stabbed — and the blade broken off inside her. With their own shotgun, the three had blown out several windows and walls defending themselves. They had even ripped out an upstairs toilet and sink and dropped them on an intruder outside. Police calmed the situation and later told reporters that there never were intruders — that the "hostages" had imagined the whole thing, except for the estimated $10,000 damage and the woman's superficial "defensive" stab wounds. (The home's methamphetamine lab apparently remained intact.)

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