If you have multiple hours on your hands, feel free to sift through all 572 pages of the Georgia Bureau of Investigation's record of the March 5 incident that won't land Ben Roethlisberger in jail but doesn't exactly make him look very good. At all.

The Smoking Gun has the details, including a summary. They lead with this, which we probably don't have to redact, but we will anyway:

The college student who accused Ben Roethlisberger of sexually assaulting her last month in a Georgia nightclub told cops that the NFL star approached her "with his [redacted] out of his pants" and followed her into a bathroom, where "he had sex with me" in spite of her objections.

Well, that gets right to it, doesn't it?