June 27, 1909: Man pours cream into his sleeve

Read it in the voice of Garrison Keillor for the full effect.

November 29, 2017 at 7:49PM

THE VICTIM OF SAD ACCIDENT

Man Pours Cream in Sleeve, Instead of Coffee.

He was a big man with a desperado moustache and a weak chin. His napkin was tucked under his collar and he read a newspaper while the waitress brought him breakfast. Without raising his eyes from the paper, he grabbed the small pitcher of cream by the circumference, in a manner that would not have been permitted at his home table, and inserted it toward him and under his palm to connect with his coffee. The cream, obeying gravity laws, ran gaily down his arm inside his sleeve. The waitress tittered. The big man grew fiery red and went out hastily, and he didn't come back.

about the writer

about the writer

Ben Welter

More from Minnesota Star Tribune

See More
card image
Provided/Sahan Journal

Family members and a lawyer say they have been blocked from access to the bedside of Bonfilia Sanchez Dominguez, while her husband was detained and shipped to Texas within 24 hours.

card image