fatsThe St. Paul Saints have had a lot of fun over the years — that’s part of their motto, after all — naming their iconic pig mascot each season.

But this year was important and special. It was Year 25 of the pig naming, and not just any name would do. The Saints CLAIM they got more than 4 million suggestions for this year’s pig, but I have a feeling that’s just part of the gag.

Because, you see, this year’s pig is named Alternative Fats.

Per the team’s clever news release: “When you’re a franchise like the Saints sometimes you need to SPICE it up, but this name is no CON and we’re doing it our WAY.  Alternative Fats will enter the field each game like no other pig before him, with a white ground covering draped from his mansion-style pigpen to home plate for the billions of Saints fans to shower him with love and admiration.  Alternative Fats will be so HUUUUGE it will make all other pigs jealous.  Alternative Fats will go down in the pantheon of the greatest mascot names in the history of sports and we know a thing or two about great sports mascots.  Welcome to the Saints Orwellian version of Animal Farm.”

That’s magnificent work by Daniel Jones of Northfield, credited with coming up with the winning name and getting a raft of prizes as a reward. This is even better than 2008 entry Boarack Ohama.

To see the Saints and Alternative Fats in all their glory, head to CHS Field. Their season starts Thursday night.

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