T.J. Miller has a good icebreaker, which he tends to repeat in his stand-up sets. "I like to drink," he'll say. The comedy just seems to flow from there.

"This woman wouldn't let me hold her baby the other day because she said I was too drunk," he once said. "OK, first of all, don't bring your baby into the bar. And second of all, if I'm drinking malt liquor on a playground, I call that a bar."

Miller is one of comedy's rising stars, having positioned himself both as a go-to voice for kids' movies ("How to Train Your Dragon," "Ice Age: A Mammoth Christmas") while keeping his cred as a gut-busting stand-up comedian (and a "Chelsea Lately" regular). Miller returns to the Mall of America's House of Comedy Friday through Sunday.

The L.A.-based comedian is a razor-sharp storyteller, crafting extended bits out of ridiculous scenarios. Do yourself a favor and search YouTube for his thoughts on getting your photo taken at the DMV. It's as if he hijacked a routine Jerry Seinfeld bit and made it weirder and funnier.

Zombies out, Santas in

What do flesh-eating pub crawlers do in the off-season? Dress up like Santas, obviously. The crew behind the massively popular Zombie Pub Crawl have taken the reins of St. Paul's third annual Santa Pub Crawl.

T.J. Miller, Star Tribune
T.J. Miller returns to the Mall of America's House of Comedy Friday through Sunday.

The Dec. 10 event will take crawlers all over St. Paul (bars include: Amsterdam, Eagle Street, O'Gara's, Groveland Tap, Tiffany's, Billy's, Shamrock's and Plum's). Don't worry, shuttles will be available. Bargoers are encouraged to dress like Santa and participate in drunken gift-wrapping and other contests. Or just hang out with the reindeer (yes, there will be reindeer). A $20 wristband gets you entry and drinks specials at the various bars. Proceeds will go to Toys for Tots.

It's a good idea to start planning your costume now. My suggestion: Zombie Santa.

Happy birthday, XYandZ

Minneapolis is filled with urban, forward-thinking art galleries -- and XYandZ is one of the best. On Friday, the south Minneapolis art spot celebrates its two-year anniversary with the opening reception for a new exhibition titled "Two." The gallery has asked some of its past exhibitors to curate the room with work by their favorite artists. The chosen pieces come from some of my favorites, too: Jennifer Davis, Adam Garcia and old-school boxcar graffiti artist BuZ Blurr.

  • Opening: 7 p.m. Fri 12/2. Runs through Dec. 17.
  • 3258 Minnehaha Av. S., Mpls
  • Free
  • www.thexyandz.com

Poetry from Palestine -- and the White House

After a lengthy break, Bao Phi's spoken-word showcase, Equilibrium, is back Saturday at the Loft Literary Center. Phi is the man behind some of the Twin Cities' most exciting poetry shows. This one features New York-based poet Remi Kanazi, a Palestinian-American who never wrote a poem that didn't make you want to run out and join the Resistance (he's the author of "Poetic Injustice: Writings on Resistance and Palestine"). Kanazi's protest pieces hum with anger and intensity, but he's not above making you laugh. Also on the bill is Jamaica Heolimeleikalani Osorio, a slam champion whose poems about Hawaiian identity have even gotten her booked at the White House, where she performed for President Obama in 2009.

  • 8 p.m. Sat. 1011 Washington Av. S., Mpls
  • $5 ($3 for members and students)
  • 612-215-2575
  • www.loft.org