First they came for the Metrodome, tore it down and ripped out all the urinal troughs. Sure, they sold the troughs in an auction, but did you really buy one?
Now comes word that Target Center, during its $140 million renovation, has removed all the troughs from the men’s bathrooms.
While some might argue this will create a more dignified bathroom experience, others would argue there is a time and place for a trough. You get in. You get out. Maybe you have a little trough conversation because you are literally shoulder to shoulder with a trough mate or two if the bathroom is crowded enough.
A giant basin that offers no privacy but maximum efficiency — here’s an upside down community sink. Why not pee here? — is a uniquely male bathroom experience. You would (probably?) not find a giant bench with no doors in the ladies room.
As such, I went to the Twitter experts to find out where in the Twin Cities a guy can still urinate in a trough now that two of the more famous locations are no longer offering the experience.
Here is what is probably an incomplete list of places that still have some sort of trough for two or more people. We’ll start with the larger venues:
*Williams Arena and the adjacent Sports Pavilion: Several Twitter peeps said The Barn still offers the trough experience. The Gophers men’s hoops team made the NCAA tourney last year. The volleyball team is a national powerhouse. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
*Mariuc — er, 3M Arena at Mariucci: Multiple sources confirm that the home of Gophers men’s hockey, which opened in 1993, has troughs.
*Roy Wilkins Auditorium: Mostly a concert venue but also a great place to watch roller derby — and, apparently, to pee in a trough. Who knew?
*First Avenue: Yes, the iconic club in downtown Minneapolis has a GIANT trough for all your between-acts, already had two tallboys urination needs.
*Local bars: Liquor Lyle’s, CC Club (ceramic!), Nomad, Grumpy’s (downtown Minneapolis), Sweeney’s, Cowboy Jack’s (downtown Minneapolis), Stub & Herb’s, Matt’s Bar and Tom Reid’s are all said to have troughs.
*Road trip: Kato Cue Club (Mankato), La Playette (St. Joseph), Memorial Stadium (University of Nebraska) and Wrigley Field have troughs, per Twitter followers.
If you are looking to continue the proud trough tradition or avoid troughs altogether, I hope you find this list useful. Please add more in the comments.