Guest Post Part I: Rocket details the five worst jerseys in the NHL

Rocket is tired of us not writing about hockey. So he took matters into his own hands. Rocket? ----------------

Maybe the problem isn't RandBall. Maybe the problem is our expectations as hockey lovers. Perhaps the real issue is not that RandBall is deliberately insulting his hockey loving public by condescendingly dropping a point about hockey in yet another post about a putrid NBA team that has no hope.

Maybe the problem is not that RandBall is gleefully reveling in his cruelty to his hockey loving readership. Maybe the problem is that he just doesn't know how to write about hockey. And if that is the problem, maybe we need to recognize the real issue. Maybe we need to treat the disease and not blame the patient. Maybe we need to show him the way. To that end, I offer the first of two hockey posts.

After months and months of careful research with a crack team of North America's finest scientists, we have been able to determine just exactly what are the best and what are the worst jerseys in the NHL. First up are the five worst jerseys. They will be listed in order of least dreadful to the most eye-searingly abysmal. You might, by the end of this post, realize that there are actually nine teams on the list and you might ask why there are nine teams on a top five list. [Redacted] you, that's why.

5. (tie) Los Angeles Kings, Anaheim Ducks

While fans of the two teams might not appreciate them being lumped together, they are both the epitome of dull and pointless jerseys. Both teams began with much more distinctive jerseys – which, by the way, is always better than boring. One for the better (Kings) and one for the worse (Ducks), but at least they were more interesting. Nowadays both teams are essentially colorless and have the personality of a bowl of porridge. The Kings are especially disappointing because they began with those unmistakable purple-and-gold numbers that were bold and distinctive. Even when they changed the color scheme in the Gretzky Era at least they were relatively classy. Unfortunately, both teams now look like the first drafts from a low level, particularly uncreative marketing executive.

4. Calgary Flames (home and away)

3. (tie) Ottawa Senators (third jersey), Tampa Bay Lightning (third jersey)

As any sports fan knows, the third jersey is, at best, a risky proposition. For every Pittsburgh Penguins blue throwback there seems to be at least one Anaheim Mighty Ducks jersey with the stupid duck bursting through the ice. Third jerseys can either be an interesting new take on a team and its identity or it can be an unholy abomination produced by the ill-formed brains of marketing weasels. The third jerseys of the Senators and the Lightning clearly fall into the latter camp. This is a shame because the regular uniforms of both teams are relatively straightforward and decent. But each team has made the unfortunate choice of plastering a nickname of the teams' nicknames on the front of the jersey. Nobody, and I mean nobody (with the obvious exception of internet commenters) should get to pick out her or his own nickname. I suppose you can give these teams credit for taking a chance, but the risk has clearly not paid off.

2. (tie) Atlanta Thrashers, Nashville Predators, Florida Panthers

The best uniforms, regardless of sport, are distinctive. As soon as you see the jersey or helmet or cap on television you should immediately be able to identify the team. These three teams tie for second worst because, aside from their ugliness, the jerseys lack distinctiveness and are interchangeable. When you see one of these teams on television you have to keep watching for a while before you can identify any of them. This is especially painful because then you have to keep looking at these putrid blobs of nothingness.

1. San Jose Sharks