OK, so this whole Nic Batum business is starting to remind us of the plot from a convoluted goofball comedy, complete with Wolves owner Glen Taylor telling our own Jerry Zgoda that his team was going to "call their bluff" in regards to Portland's threat to match any offer sheet for Batum. Seriously, this started out as a nice little party -- a chance to get in with the cool kids and make a move -- and now we're just waiting for a hammered Jonah Hill to start throwing up. (Sorry to ruin the plot of "Superbad.")

Is Batum really worth all this back-room negotiation? Should the Wolves have just given it their best shot and moved on?

Hopefully this is the last day of any kind of saga. Either a deal emerges for a sign-and-trade, or the Wolves ink him to an offer sheet and we wait to see if Portland matches.

Also, while we spent much of the past couple days consumed by Batum, this happened: the Lakers decided they wanted to become the Celtics -- in other words, old as [redacted].

Pau Gasol is 32. Kobe Bryant is going to be 34 next month. They already signed 38-year-old Steve Nash. And now they reportedly have their eyes on another complementary big man -- either Antawn Jamison (36), Elton Brand (33) or Jermaine O'Neal (a very old 33).

Showtime? More like nap time, right?

*Of all these players, only Nash and Jamison are older than we are.