Your Comments and The Breakdown in Constructive Dialogue

Below is a comment that was posted to my blog on stem cell research. I think the comment is well stated and cuts to the point.

"Just say it... The benefits of this kind of research outweigh the moral ambiguities involved. Nothing abstract or unclear there. Why is that so hard to admit?"

I believe the commenter was voicing impatience with my piece because I did not come out and flatly state that we should fund stem cell research. In the piece, I drew on my personal experience and said that I would be donating to science the embryos that my wife and I have remaining after going through the in-vitro fertilization process. I stopped short, however, of taking a general position.

In another response to my piece, someone who is against funding stem cell research wrote,

"The world has moved on from this argument...It's obvious that Mr. Sanford has been profoundly affected by this subject. I should note, however, that if you look beyond the emotional heart-string tugging, he fails to make the point that we should fund embryonic stem-cell research..."

I say that the writer is exactly right. I failed to make the point because I was intentionally NOT making the point.

In fact, his brings me to the point of this particular blog. Over these last 8-16 years (Bush and Clinton Administrations), I have been deeply struck by a great schism in our country - between democrat and republican, liberal and conservative, between right-to-life and right-to-choose and on and on. We have all watched the train wreck that is our Congress, that is the relationship between the President and our Congress, and even that exists between the Justices on our Supreme Court. Moreover, have you noticed that talking politics is a buzz-kill at a social gathering? That there are subjects that you can't discuss for fear of offending someone. This train wreck, this schism is not just in our government. It exists in almost every room full of people that we are in. It is just that, as good stoic Minnesotans, we find ways not to talk about it.

I may be sounding idealistic. But I think something really dangerous is happening. We aren't actually problem-solving together. We are living in a time of mind-boggling, rapid change. We are living with problems that have never been experienced at the same scale before in human history. Do you really think the answers are easy, that old ideas will work if we only yell them out a little louder? One commenter commented on my blog regarding President Obama's proposed deficit that all we have to do is "cut spending and not raise taxes...it is not rocket science." I wish the answers were that simple. They are not. The downturn in the economy is not just about money anymore. It is also a psychological problem on a collective level - as consumers and as investors, we have lost confidence...we have lost trust.

What's dangerous about the current times is a breakdown of constructive dialogue. Thoughtful, meaningful communication is what creates and generates solutions, not power struggles between abstractions and principles. Human communication, human ingenuity, and compassion is what happens when we look each other in the eye...when we actually listen. This is what we need now. It is hopeful that listening can be easily practiced at any time, in any place. It does not require a social/political issue. It begins with the person across the table from you - at home, at work, across a fence, or over your favorite beverage.

Finally, in my blog about President Obama's deficit and the details of his stimulus package, I wrote, "But I know that if we walk together in the same direction, the details won't matter as much. Things will get better." To which a commenter wrote,

"Walking together off a cliff...Walking together for the sake of unity is not helpful if it means every one walks off a cliff."