Stadium etiquette is a touchy subject because you pay your money and you never quite know what to expect, which a friend found out a couple of years back when he dared not to root for the Gophers at TCF Bank stadium. But that's another story.
For the next time you're at a Twins or Gophers or Lynx or Minnesota Stars FC game, and not completely mesmerized by the action, maybe you and your seat mates can debate the rules for ballpark behavior that Sports Illustrated writer Steve Rushin posted on the magazine web site.
We're going to jump to No. 7 right here because Upload is a strong believer in its sanctity:
The Souvenirs Are for Children: Please don't throw yourself in front of me as if I were the president and you were a Secret Service agent taking a bullet, when in fact you're risking your safety (and mine) to catch a $2 T-shirt shot-gunned into the stands. To watch grown men fighting for a foul ball like bridesmaids on America's Funniest Videos fighting for a bouquet is to witness one of sport's saddest spectacles.
Here are the rest of the rules. Have at 'em.
And if you want to know what it was like being a pre-teen working in the innards of Met Stadium in the early 1980s, read this Rushin story from a couple of years back.
