There is someone in a worse position than me

My mom, Sharon Hazelwood, died on October 18 at age 70 from complications of scleroderma, a very painful and debilitating autoimmune disease.

She inspired me in many ways as a dedicated daughter, wife, mother, friend and employee.

But most of all she inspired me with her selflessness, her courage in the face of adversity and her positive and optimistic outlook.

Although given 10 years to live at the time of her diagnosis at age 52, she did not let her illness define or limit her. She said, "This is not a death sentence" and "there is someone worse than me."

Despite facing years of pain and disability, she never complained and fulfilled her dreams of world travel, visiting Europe, China, Australia, Egypt and even Kenya in recent years and months, navigating the pyramids wearing a medical boot after recent ankle surgery and often hobbling along with her trusty travel walker.

Her doctor told me after her death, "For a long, long time she refused to both give up and give in."

She became very ill during the last weekend of September, but tried to hide it because her 90-year-old mother was also sick with pneumonia. As was true for all of the time that I knew her, my mom's first concern was for others.

My mom loved Christmas and always made this time of year extra special for her entire family with parties, cookies, more gifts and food than necessary, a Dickens village and church attendance on Christmas Eve.

Confronted with my own raw grief during the holidays I have struggled to comprehend the heartache suffered by parents and families in Newtown, CT. I think of my mom's attitude and realize, "Yes, there is someone in a worse position than me."