An Army bugler played taps at Fort Snelling National Cemetery in 2007 for a soldier who had been killed in Afghanistan. (David Joles, Star Tribune/The Minnesota Star Tribune)

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There is reason for celebration as well as remembrance today. This is the first Memorial Day in 20 years that our nation is not at war — hallelujah!

Our celebration must, however, be tempered by the fact that among the 3 million-plus members of our armed forces who served in the Iraq and Afghanistan wars (including my son), 7,057 service members — and 8,000 civilian contractors — gave the last full measure for their country.

We must remember, too, that those lives lost also mean that thousands of families watched with dread as a military vehicle pulled up to their home bringing them the terrible news. No words can describe that pain.

An additional and unique pain from these wars that we must acknowledge is reflected in the high suicide rate among these veterans. As of July 2021, 30,177 have taken their own lives. That's more than four times as many as those who died in combat. The demons of war always claim their share one way or the other.

Therefore, this Memorial Day I hope we can put aside our petty political differences and come together to back up our usual empty "thoughts and prayers" with real action to support these heroes.

First, as the bills come due in the years to come, some estimate that caring for these vets alone will cost $2.5 trillion. Let's pledge to do our duty and pay our fair share without whining and complaint.

Second, our leaders — and more important, we citizens — must take responsibility for the wars to which we commit our troops. When called, the men and women of our military will answer as they always have. That is all the more reason that we should never send them into harm's way for unnecessary wars of choice. It is the very least we can do as we take safety and comfort in the security they provide.

For now, though, let's celebrate this rare moment between wars and honor all the loved ones we've lost — and dream that peace becomes the norm.

To close, thoughts on taps:

I can't listen to taps and not tear up. Sometimes I'm not sure why I'm crying. Is it because of the magnificent mournful sound that so perfectly matches the feeling of saying farewell to a warrior? Or am I crying for all the loved ones left behind — the millions over many years? Sometimes I think I'm crying for something else; maybe I'm crying for myself.

Ultimately, I think I'm crying because taps reminds me that the world never seems to change for the better. No matter how many heroes pay the ultimate price, war always demands more. And it is always our young whom it craves.

Maybe I'm sad that someone somewhere will always be able to make complete strangers kill each other for the same reasons over and over, like an eternal World War I trench battle that rages over the same, small piece of ground in perpetuity. Each generation, like some militant Sisyphus, pushes the rock of war up the hill only to have it roll back on the next. No matter how just, proud, or righteous that rock appears, it remains a monument to belligerent humanity's worst instincts.

I spent 28 years in the military, and my son has also served honorably. Someday taps will sound for each of us. And for that I am proud.

But knowing that melancholy song will need to be played for endless future generations will always make me cry.

And for that I am not ashamed.

D. Roger Pederson, of Minneapolis, is a retired military officer and health care analyst.