Try to imagine St. Patrick's Day as a national holiday. We would get a paid day off for partying. Rivers of green beer would flow in the streets. And we could enjoy an even bigger hangover the day after.

There's a real campaign behind this silly idea, but it's more of a publicity stunt by beer giant Guinness. (Check out Proposition317.com.)

The Twin Cities' own Irish patriarch, bar owner Kieran Folliard, found such a lark amusing but "completely ridiculous." Fans of St. Paddy's Day don't need the government to tell them when to party, he said.

Indeed, Folliard and his brethren in the bar scene have a cavalcade of parties planned, making this year's St. Patrick's Day the most anticipated Tuesday since election season. With so many to choose from, we offer up some suggestions for finding your ideal St. Paddy's Day party.

With three stages of music, there will be plenty of dancing at Kieran's Irish Pub. The Belfast Cowboys headline the tent outside. It's a special St. Paddy's Day with this year marking the 15th anniversary of Kieran's.

The Nomad Pub offers its annual "Break the Seal" challenge, where beer is free until someone pees. Last year, free beer flowed for two hours. Afterward: dirty limericks by the fire, cover bands and more shenanigans.

(Doors open at 3 p.m. Tue. and lock at 4 p.m. for the challenge. Free.)

Well, you knew some nightclub was gonna do it. The Lone Tree in downtown Minneapolis will host what it calls "midget leprechaun wrestling." (9 p.m. Tue.)

It wouldn't be a St. Paddy's Day party in Minnesota without an outdoor tent in the dead of winter. One of the biggest happens at O'Donovan's in downtown Minneapolis, where the Wild Colonial Bhoys play at 9 p.m. Across the river from downtown, Keegan's tent party will have music all day, too.

Don't want to come into the city? Don't worry. There are two locally owned Irish bars in the suburbs and both are throwing big parties. Kip's in St. Louis Park has a tent with music, while Jake O'Connor's in Excelsior has bagpipers and bands.

The Finnegan's pub crawl is always a hot ticket (two buses will visit Irish bars throughout the metro). There still might be seats left. If not, check out the after-party at Stella's in Uptown. (See www.finnegans.org.)

If you don't think your attention span can stand the two St. Paddy's Day parades in Minneapolis and St. Paul, O'Gara's offers the "World's Shortest St. Patrick's Day Parade" at 3 p.m. in its bar. O'Gara's will, of course, have much more planned for its 68th annual celebration, including a lot of live music.