THE NSA
So many devils in all of those details
You want to spy on us all.
Congratulations!
You see through PRISM darkly. If you need some extra assistance, just go to the experts in HUMINT, who once provided security for East Germany and the Soviet Union, namely the Stasi and the KGB.
You were supposed to be a state secret. But media blabbermouths can't keep a secret, can they?
You are doing a great job winning the battle against terrorists and democrats, too.
Just think of all the valuable data you're going to be privy to. You could alert remedial English teachers about my last sentence ending in "to." It is a preposition and function word, and it always has an object, which is usually a noun or pronoun. You see, instead of turning myself in, I consulted a primer, Harbrace College Handbook, 7th ed., which informs me that a preposition (i.e., "to," "at," "by," "for," "from," etc.) with its object and any modifiers is called a prepositional phrase, i.e, "to the republic," "by the people," "for the people" and, to quote my source, the primer's authors, Hodges and Whitten, "Byron expressed with great force his love of liberty."
Consider the constitutional grammar of law and Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, with its adroit use of three prepositional phrases: Of the people, by the people and for the people.
On that note, maybe congratulations to our intelligence-gathering agencies are a bit premature.