Chuck and Carolyn Engeldinger had their son cremated to spare their other children the sight of someone protesting at his burial or desecrating his grave.
Instead, strangers from near and far have written, saying they, too, know the terror of watching a loved one spiral into a world of delusion.
And last week, a card came in the mail from Green Bay. Signed by the siblings of UPS driver Keith Basinski, it offered the Engeldingers sympathy for the loss of their son.
Their son, Andrew Engeldinger, who pulled a pistol from his waistband Sept. 27 at the Minneapolis company where he was an engraver and fatally wounded six people before turning the muzzle on himself, in what's believed to be the deadliest workplace shooting in state history.
The Engeldingers sat down Thursday in their modest Richfield home to talk about their son's gradual degeneration from a happy childhood into a surreal funk that they believe was schizophrenia, the same progressive brain disease that struck Carolyn's late mother and another close relative.
They said they granted the interview because they want their son to serve as a powerful example of why society must find more effective ways of identifying and helping people with mental illnesses.
"We need to find some meaning in all the damage Andy inflicted," she said. "We can't undo it, but we have to try to do something for the sake of all those families and our son."
A shrinking personality