The international sportswear retailer Bjorn Borg (namesake of the Swedish tennis player) created a promotional video game (now also sold separately) that encourages not mayhem and murder, but the vanquishing of one's opponents with love — and "lovingly" stripping them down so that they can be outfitted in Bjorn Borg fashions. Said a company official, a player's mission is "to liberate haters by undressing them with your love guns and (then to) dress them in Bjorn Borg clothing." (The game also features "teddy bear smoke grenades" and a shirtless man resembling Vladimir Putin astride a bear.)

Breaking bad

Mark Rothwell made the news in Portland, Ore., in March 2010 when he prevented a bank robbery (and rescued the terrified Chase teller) by jumping the thief, knocking his gun away and holding him until police arrived. He was later awarded a coveted Portland police Civilian Medal for Heroism. However, on Feb. 19 of this year, according to an arrest report, Rothwell himself pulled a gun and robbed the Albina Community Bank in Portland, making off with $15,700.

For Arthur Mondella, 57, a successful maraschino cherry supplier in New York City, last month's inspection by the district attorney's office was to be routine, concerning possible pollution of local waters from discharges of cherry syrup. Mondella was cooperative until the investigator discovered odd shelving "attached" to a wall with magnets, revealing a "secret" room, and then the smell of marijuana — at which point Mondella calmly left the room and shot himself in the head. Ultimately, police found that the 75-year-old company was merely a side business to Mondella's substantial marijuana-growing operation in the basement.

Big crime

Morrison Wilson, 58, was convicted of assault in Belfast (Northern Ireland) Magistrates Court in February for using his admittedly "big belly" to "bounce" an aggressive neighbor lady out of his garden in a dispute. The lady was injured as she fell backward.

Delicate generation

As alleged de-facto policy at Avalon Elementary School in Orlando, Fla., officials last year prohibited toilet-flushing during the statewide Florida Comprehensive Assessment Test. It was thought, an official said, that the whooshing water sounds from nearby bathrooms would disturb the students (and send their scores, according to an Orlando Sentinel reporter, "spiraling down the drain").

Truck on truck

The driver of an empty auto-transport truck pulled off the Bishop Ford Freeway near Calumet City, Ill., in February after he heard a calamitous sound and felt the trailer shaking violently. It turns out that Asa Cole, 23, speeding and following too closely, had inadvertently driven his pickup truck up the low-hanging ramps of the trailer and came to a stop only inches away from the cab. Said the carrier driver, "Is this 'Dukes of Hazzard' or something?" Cole was cited for several violations.

Candid camera

Aleksander Tomaszewski, 33, was convicted of filing a false police report after a January incident in Lane County, Ore., when he claimed police had beaten him up in his cell after his arrest for stalking and sexual abuse. Tomaszewski's face evidenced a beating, but he was obviously unaware of the surveillance camera, which revealed that, over a four-minute period, Tomaszewski (alone in his cell) had punched himself in the face 45 times to create the "police" attack.

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