A naked man opened the door to firefighters responding to a house fire in Niceville, Fla., on Aug. 27 and said "I'm sorry" before closing the door in their faces. James Cunningham, 53, later admitted to police he'd had two liters of vodka and had smoked marijuana before trying to bake cookies on his George Foreman grill, reported WPLG Local 10. The experiment went wrong when the grill and cookies caught fire, so he covered them with a dry towel, which also caught fire. Firefighters said if he'd been in the house any longer, he could have died from smoke inhalation.

Questionable judgment

School resource officer and part-time police officer Maryssa Boskoski, 32, was called into a classroom at Liberty Preparatory School in Smithville, Ohio, on Aug. 30 to help rouse a sleeping student who could not be awakened by the teacher or even the principal. When Boskoski arrived, the Washington Post reported, her solution was to unholster her Taser, remove the firing cartridge and pull the trigger, causing an electric buzz that woke the student and shocked the school community. Smithville Police Chief Howard Funk placed Boskoski on unpaid leave and told WEWS news station Boskoski had been disciplined a month earlier, also for a Taser-related incident. An investigation was ongoing.

Ewwww!

At Kirby High School in Memphis, things are quiet as a mouse ... or a rat. Shelby County Schools Superintendent Dorsey Hopson told the Memphis Commercial Appeal he's looking for a temporary home for Kirby's 800 students after closing the school Sept. 5 due to a rat infestation. District personnel uncovered a rat's nest during am August renovation project. Eighty rats were trapped at the school and poison was set out. When students returned after Labor Day, poisoned rats began dying within the school's walls and the stench became overwhelming. Calling the situation an "unavoidable act of nature," Hopson said he expects students to return in early November.

Family values

Patricia Ann Hill, 69, of White Hall, Ark., called 911 on July 28 to report she had shot her husband, Frank, 65. But she had a motive: Patricia told Jefferson County Sheriff's investigators she had previously disagreed with her husband's purchase of a pornography channel on Dish Network, and she canceled the channel, telling Frank that if he reordered it, he'd have to leave. That day, reported the Pine Bluff Commercial, the Dish bill arrived, revealing that the channel had been re-added, so Patricia confronted Frank in his "man cave" and told him to go. When he refused, Patricia fetched a .22-caliber pistol from the house and shot him twice, killing him. Hill was charged with capital murder and held without bail in the Jefferson County adult detention center.

Least competent criminal

Taiheem M. McKay, 23, of Riverhead, N.Y., made it easy for Suffolk County officials to track him down after suspecting him of breaking into 10 homes over the course of seven months, stealing cash, jewelry and designer accessories. According to Newsday, the Suffolk County Department of Probation traced McKay to the burglary locations through his GPS ankle monitor, which he was wearing as a result of a February 2017 second-degree reckless endangerment conviction.

News of the Weird is compiled by the editors at Andrews McMeel Syndication. Send your weird news items to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.