The role Madison Lang landed in the University of Minnesota Duluth's production of "Machinal" was the first time in college that she held a lead on the main stage. Between rehearsals and theater and dance classes, she was spending 13-hour days at the School of Fine Arts.
Minnesota college seniors grieve the loss of milestone moments to COVID-19
Canceled commencement ceremonies and other events are among the memories lost in the last semester before graduation.
But after just four performances, the show was shelved by COVID-19. Classes will be online for the rest of the semester and graduation ceremonies are suspended at University of Minnesota campuses.
"It's really emotional," Lang said, her voice breaking, seeing the end of a college career without a closing performance, a senior banquet or the ultimate walk across a stage in cap and gown. "We feel like we lost a lot of memories that we would have made."
While senior year on college campuses is about looking to the future while also celebrating the past, that's not the case for Lang and other classmates preparing for graduation this spring. As colleges and universities cancel all in-person classes, scratch events and performances and cancel commencement ceremonies to slow the spread of the novel coronavirus, seniors are left to grieve the loss of milestone moments that define the last semester before graduation. "I've cried a lot," said Beth Klein, a 25-year-old who graduated from UMD in December but planned to participate in the spring commencement ceremony that will no longer be held.
"I already have my degree, but I really wanted to walk across that stage. It would solidify that feeling of completion," she said, adding that she had friends and family members planning to travel for the celebration. "I completely understand why this is being done, but it doesn't make it any less disappointing."
Esmee Verschoor is the first person on her father's side of the family to graduate from college. Though she completed her coursework in December and has technically graduated, earning cum laude honors in the process, she fears she's about to lose the chance to proudly march across the commencement stage.
While the University of St. Thomas hasn't made an announcement, she said the school has until now mirrored the coronavirus steps the University of Minnesota has taken.
"It's a big deal. A really big deal for that side of the family," said Verschoor, who moved to the United States from the Netherlands when she was very young. Her mother is American, her father is Dutch.
"I was looking forward to having everyone come and celebrate with me. It's just really disappointing that I'm not going to be able to have that day."
Michael Achterling admits to a certain ambivalence about possibly losing a graduation ceremony. To the 37-year-old Navy veteran who has nine credits left before finishing at the U, the biggest casualty of the COVID-19 scare has been the loss of community. He's loved going to classes and engaging in discussions with other students and professors.
"I have loved being in that classroom and being in that environment, where everything is right there for you," he said. "Now, all of a sudden, it's not."
After talking to his mother, Achterling admits he would have liked that graduation march after all.
"She really wants me to walk," he said. "It's one of those benchmark moments."
The pandemic has robbed seniors of more than just graduation ceremonies.
Blake Stelzer of Lakeville has already graduated from Concordia University St. Paul. But after arm surgeries ended several baseball seasons, this would have been the grad student's last chance to pitch at full-strength for the Golden Bears. That hope ended last week when the NCAA abruptly canceled the season.
"To be honest, it was probably the best team that I have ever been on," he said. "I just hate to leave them this early. I have never felt this before — just the culture."
Seniors aren't the only class feeling shortchanged by the pandemic.
The only cluster of activity on the otherwise quiet U campus in Minneapolis on Tuesday was near the dorms, where students and parents — some of them wearing masks — rolled laundry carts full of clothes and dorm room décor to waiting vehicles. After Monday's announcement that in-person classes at all the U's campuses would be suspended through the end of the semester, dozens of families decided to move their students back home.
"I'll be glad to have him around, but college is that fun time to be on your own," said Jason Helgeson, whose son, Cole, is a freshman computer science major. "This is kind of robbing some of that."
Cole Helgeson said he made the decision to move home to New Brighton after Monday's announcement on the classes.
"Everyone I know is moving out, too," he said. "There's no reason to be on campus now."
Tatiana Polovtceva, a junior, is attending the U on scholarship from Russia. She's been awaiting word from her program about whether she should return home amid the pandemic. She has extended family in Wisconsin and could stay with them in case she needs to move out of the dorms.
"This is quite unusual. It's not what I expected my year here to be," she said as she carried a tray of food from the dining hall back to her dorm. "I'm just waiting to hear more."
Peyton Green, a freshman, spent Tuesday morning hauling most of her personal items out of her dorm room to move back in with her parents in Wausau, Wis. She's hoping to hear from the university about a reimbursement for housing and dining and worries about how she'll continue private music lessons online. Green said she'd like to find a job after moving home, but she assumes few places will be hiring amid virus concerns.
"I'm really sad about having to leave campus," she said. "But everyone has to make sacrifices right now."
Her father, Todd Green, agreed.
"My heart goes out to her," he said. "I wish it wasn't like this, but it's important. I applaud everyone for doing what they can to get on top of this."
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