Long before it became personal, Athena Adkins wondered whether there was anything she could do about gun violence. The light bulb went off when she heard about schools conducting drills to teach students how to hide from armed intruders. It had come to this: Our public institutions were coaching kids on how to survive the most likely dangers in their world — tornadoes and gunfire.

Adkins and friend Emily Brennan stumbled across Moms Demand Action for Gun Sense in America, a national organization that rejects vitriolic arguments with gun owners in favor of actions that seek to simply reduce gun violence. They agreed in March to host a house party, kind of the 2016 version of the Tupperware party, in which moms get together to raise money and talk about the effect of guns in their lives.

The party was scheduled for Friday, April 22. There would be sandwiches, coffee, and chocolate chip cookies. The group asked Adkins whether they could send a survivor of gun violence to speak, to make it real.

"I said 'no,' " said Adkins. "It seemed kind of gratuitous. We all knew about the impact of gun violence; we didn't need to ask somebody to be vulnerable."

It all got very real a couple of weeks before the planned party. On April 7, a man burst into the St. Paul office that Adkins shares with her husband, Dan, looking to kill him.

Dan, a defense attorney, was in court. Athena was out of the office, spending time with family over spring break. But the intruder was angry, and he had a gun. He shot their clerk and good friend, Chase Passauer, six times, killing him.

So Friday night, Adkins moved the party to a nearby church, where she reluctantly spoke of the tragedy in front of about 30 invited guests. There was nothing gratuitous about it.

"We are broken apart, and three weeks later I don't know how we are going to put these pieces back together," Adkins said. "Every person has asked me if there is something they can do. There is something."

Dan Adkins, the intended victim, was there, too. His voice cracked as he spoke.

"We buried my hero a week ago," Dan said. "He had the world by the tail. He was 23."

Athena Adkins said they knew Passauer for about five years, and he had become part of an extended family. Like her husband, Passauer umpired baseball games; they were part of a "brotherhood." They were also both philosophy majors, so despite a 20-year age difference, they went out for beers and became friends. Dan called him "my boy."

"Peas in a pod," said Athena.

From the back of the church, Dan Adkins talked about how acquaintances said he should get a gun to protect himself. He understands their fear, but added, "We are arming ourselves. We can't do that. In honor of our boy and our pain, this has to stop."

Nearly everyone in the room Friday had been affected by gun violence. Some were teachers, who heard stories from students whose family members had been shot, or from other teachers, feeling frustrated and helpless in having to conduct regular exercises to teach children to hide from shooters.

One woman's cousin had been murdered in California a couple of weeks ago. Another woman talked about her child coming home to tell her he had the best classroom in the school: It has a second escape door.

Marit Brock, a volunteer chapter leader of Moms Demand Action, provided the sobering facts. More than 80 percent of Minnesotans agree on background checks for all gun sales, yet anyone can sell anyone a gun from the trunk of a car in a McDonald's parking lot, no questions asked. In the 18 states where background checks are mandatory, gun violence is down. Background checks make a difference, she said.

The man who killed Passauer was a felon who was not supposed to have a gun, so this law might not have stopped him. But it will stop some, Brock said.

Moms Demand Action will hold a rally at the Capitol Tuesday and participate in a hearing at the Legislature. There are bills currently in the Minnesota House and Senate to expand background checks, but the group does not expect any action this session. It is hoping to find bipartisan support by next year.

"We are not the gun grabbers," said Brock, whose brother killed himself with a gun. The group does not use phrases such as "gun nuts" or "gun control."

"The gun lobby is not crazy," Brock said. "We just disagree with them."

That philosophy, finding common ground with gun advocates to take steps to curb gun violence and promote safety, is what drew the Adkins to the group.

"I'm not a hard-core partisan person," said Athena Adkins. "There are some real options here. We can find a middle ground. It's a big tent; let's try something and see what we can do."

Moms Demand Action has gone from a fledgling operation out of a garage to an organization whose membership now rivals that of the National Rifle Association. It can accomplish big things, just like Mothers Against Drunk Driving has done, Adkins said.

"Tell legislators to close the backdoor loophole," Adkins told the group. "Or we will find legislators who will."

jtevlin@startribune.com • 612-673-1702

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