FORT MYERS, FLA. — If the Twins were house paint, they'd be beige.
If they were a food, they'd be wild rice soup.
Last year, Danny Valencia strutted into the Twins' understated clubhouse and stood out like a disco ball in a DMV.
"What's the opposite of a chameleon?" outfielder Michael Cuddyer said. "Whatever the opposite is, that's what Danny was. So if the background was green, he'd be blue."
Valencia's personality cost him plenty of green last year. Cuddyer and the other veterans fined him constantly for violations of unwritten Twins rules.
In baseball, this justice system is called the Kangaroo Court. You do not have the right to legal representation. You do not get one phone call.
Valencia, who made himself the Twins' third baseman of the present and future last summer, not only had to pay fines, he had to carry the box in which the fine money was kept.
"He got fined for everything," Cuddyer said. "From wearing sunglasses at midnight during an interview -- inside! -- to leaving the Kangaroo Court box pretty much everywhere we went. We'd go on the road, and he'd forget it. There were numerous other things along the way."