My grandson got deported before he even had a chance to come home. Or that's the way it feels.
Noa, who recently turned 19 months old, has just learned to respond when someone calls his name, by raising his hand, clapping and laughing like a dolphin. We watch him growing up via weekly Skypes. His father (our son) and his mother (our daughter-in-law) have been living in Japan and were planning to return home with Noa this summer.
Then they discovered just how messed up our immigration system really is. Our son is a U.S. citizen, and so is Noa, but his mom is French. When they went to the U.S. embassy in Tokyo to get the paperwork to come to Minneapolis, she was "denied."
There are more than 22 million American citizens married to people from other countries. Nearly every one of them can tell stories like ours — of a "system" whose rules are so complex they are almost a parody, and of the reality that makes trying to follow the rules irrelevant: It often boils down to whom you talk to and when you talk to them.
These are the people who are victims when a bureaucrat makes a decision that breaks up families. This is the part of "comprehensive" immigration reform that gets lost in the politics.
In 2005, our son married a woman from France. They lived here while he taught math and she secured a green card (after many frustrating months and many thousands of dollars) so she could work at the University of Minnesota and in other administrative jobs.
They moved to Seattle, where they continued their careers, but when the recession hit, teachers were fired and jobs were scarce. So my son took a teaching position in Kobe, Japan, where Noa was born.
Most people think that if you marry an American citizen, you become one. Not true. Most believe that once you achieve "permanent resident" status (a green card) you can come and go as you please. Not true. Most people believe that as a U.S. citizen you can bring your child back with you when you return after working abroad. Technically true. But if the child is an infant and his mom has been "denied," then, realistically, not true.