How to be grateful for our lane-closure signs

Let's head over to the Children's Section of the internet, and see what BuzzFeed has put up today. Why, it's 10 Midwest Cities You Should Visit. A gold star for the bossy Should, but an even number for the list? Tsk. Anyhoo, let's check the copy; number 9 is Springfield.

If my 13 year old wrote that for a class assignment I'd make her start over. Here's the entry on Madison:

Keep this in mind the next time someone advises "buzzfeeding" any project you're working on. Probably easier than gawkifying it, though. Speaking of which: Pando unloads today. Look Who's Gawking: Inside Nick Denton's phony, hypocritical class war against tech workers

The article saves the bulk of its ire for the fellow who brought the world the world-ending tweet by Julia Sacco last week. Tell us how you really feel:

Angry and bilious: enjoy! Or, if you want something lighter and more appropriate for your lifestyle, here's a typical HuffPo headline: 4 Things Restaurant Chefs Wish They Could Tell You But obviously they can't, or the headline would say "4 Things Chefs Are Glad They Can Tell You, Right Here." So I won't link, lest you be disappointed.

DCVotD World's first VTOL van:

Lifeleak says he was hospitalized with non-lethal injuries. Full-screen it and check the left side for the immense flashing warning arrow. By which I mean "six 20Watt bulbs whose blinking pattern imparts not particular instruction."

ARCHITORTURE Another day, another attempt to fix the surburbs. At least this writer nails the problem right out of the box:

There's your problem. Someone in Alberta might look up and down the street and think "Good Lord, this could be Phoenix. My life is a lie." Or not. I think the Alberta burbs are probably less inclined to adopt the adobe aesthetic and have lawns full of prickly plants that draw blood if you brush against them. But that's a minor thing. Mostly souls are being crushed. Daily:

That last point is nonsense. Anyway, fewer souls will be crushed in the future, when "Green" houses lead to variegated designs:

"See, the reason the films are mocking the suppressed individuality, honey, is the filmmakers were overgrown smirky adolescents who had to find something wrong with other people to muffle their feelings of inferiority. It wasn't really like that. It wasn't really like that at all."

Don't get me wrong; more efficient houses are better, and the old cul-de-sac / winding streets model isn't for everyone. The article has a prototype of the new suburban house, which looks like a folded-up mattress wearing a mirror. This is not what most people want, and the author knows that: