Q: What should you talk to your Tinder match about while in quarantine?
A: You’re likely going to talk about the coronavirus and what you are doing to deal with it, but don’t make your whole conversation about it. Talk about things you would’ve talked about before the quarantine: What are your usual social activities and hobbies? What normally keeps you busy? These things are great ways to find out who your matches actually are.
It would be easy to take the conversation to a negative place. While there is a lot to complain, worry and stress about right now, think of your conversations as an escape from the coronavirus heaviness. Talk about what you look forward to doing post-quarantine. Be real, but do your best to encourage lighthearted banter, as well.
Also, consider setting a time limit for messaging/chatting/FaceTiming. You might have a lot of time on your hands now, but that doesn’t mean that you should give all of your time to one virtual crush. Take your time and enjoy getting to know new people. It will make it that much sweeter when you get to meet each other face to face.
ERIN TILLMAN, dating coach and author of “The Consent Guidebook”
A: Although being quarantined doesn’t make your dating life any easier, the one advantage is having the opportunity to truly get to know other people on a deeper level. You want to have conversations about the topics that matter to you in everyday life, so that when our lives go back to normal, you have a good sense of who your Tinder matches are, what their lives are like and if you could potentially see yourself dating.
A great topic to start with is discussing what is most important to you, your interests and what you are passionate about. Your conversation should have a nice balance between topics like your pet peeves, something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t yet done and your biggest fear, and also lighter topics like your most embarrassing moment, what your favorite food is and your favorite Netflix shows.
Be sure to bring up topics that are important and relevant to you and your life. For example, if you have a dog, find out if the person you’re talking to likes dogs. If you work out six days a week, be sure to ask if fitness is important to the other person.
People show you who they are with their responses. Pay attention to what people are saying and how they’re making you feel during your communication. Is the person holding your attention? Do you have things in common? Take this time to evaluate your feelings and determine whether it’s worth continuing to invest time and energy in this person.
DIANA MANDELL, dating and relationship expert