Q: Friends who are in a relationship engage in excessive PDA whenever the three of you hang out together. How do you tell them to tone it down?
A: Aggressive PDA is most common in the beginning of a relationship, so the issue probably will resolve itself over time. Still, it's also OK to say, "This is a bit much."
You don't want to come off as being too judgmental. Keep in mind that this conversation isn't just about your feelings, but how your friends feel about each other. Make it clear that you appreciate how into each other they are and that you support their relationship. Say, "I'm glad you two are happy, and it's nice to see you two in love, but it would be great if you could cool it a little bit. I feel uncomfortable trying to talk with you while you're all over each other."
The couple need to know that you aren't trying to break them up, but that you just don't want them making out in front of you.
GIGI ENGLE, certified sex coach and author of "All the [expletive] Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love and Life"
A: The standard thing for people to say is, "Get a room!" But that can be insulting. I might say, "Does it ever occur to you that your PDA could make other people jealous or uncomfortable?"
Whatever you say, use a very light tone because the couple are madly in love and probably not even aware of the PDA — or, for that matter, of anyone else. Big parts of the brain shut down when you're in love, and the two are just in their own world and focused on each other.
They're not trying to embarrass anybody; they're just not aware of how their PDA can be perceived.
HELEN FISHER, author of "Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage and Why We Stray"
