C.J.: Turns out, the 'best-looking man in comedy' has a delightful son

Nobody takes down the delusional "Best Looking Man in Comedy" with quite the precision of his son, Trevón.

It has been at least 15 years since I last dined with Fancy Ray, the comedian, bad poet and commercial pitchman who splits his act between L.A. and Minneapolis these days because his adorable 12-year-old son lives here. I recall feeling sufficiently punished at that lunch at long-since-defunct Azur when Fancy Ray kept calling attention to our table by, among other shenanigans, showing off his disturbingly bird-like chest.

While I do relish ripping that Fancy ego, he deserves respect for eagerly embracing fatherhood and being a reliable presence in Trevón's life. I agreed to hang out with Fancy Ray so I could catch up with delightful Trevón, whose other doting parent is his mom, Rochelle.

With Fancy, Trevón and my video camera, we went to Punch for pizza before going to the Mall of America. At the MOA every kiosk operator selling hand treatment, hair and bling caught Fancy's eye, and there were even shrieks of enjoyment from shoppers who spotted Fancy Ray.

While Trevón ate Punch's great pizza, the subject of him not being quite as attentive as usual in school came up. Trevón promised to get back to the books.

"I always did well in school," Fancy Ray said. "I was in a magnet program; I skipped from eighth to 10th grade." That was only part of the story. The effortless deep cut Trevón provided for this moment cannot be captured in print.

"Tell her how often you got suspended from school," Trevón said, leaning lackadaisically into his dad's shoulder. It was a priceless We're-not-going-let-my-dirty-school-laundry-flap-alone-in-this-breeze amplification.

He has clearly overcome those childhood anger issues, which were so exhausting for his mom, Toni McCloney (now living in Arizona), that she only had the energy to whup Fancy every other time he got bounced.

Trevón, very attentive to his hyper dad's every move, noticed Fancy Ray had gone into Punch's women's restroom by mistake. I videotaped the mildly embarrassing moment for Fancy Ray, who explained: "When you're as pretty as I am, nobody even notices when you go in the ladies' restroom."

Asked if he thought his daddy was funny, Trevón said with perfect timing: "Funny looking."

Speaking of those distinctive Fancy Ray looks, what does Trevón think of his dad's hair and, uhhhh, eyebrows?

"He needs to take a shaver" to those roller-set curls, Trevón said. "His hair takes too much time. He doesn't have any eyebrows, so no comment on that."

An eyebrow pencil would be more appropriate, MAC folks. Many are curious about his tattooed eyebrows, which he enhances with a pencil when it suits his "fancy," to use his favorite word. "It's just sexy, unique and totally me," Fancy Ray said. "One of a kind."

One's definitely enough of some kinds.

Little Loeffler Landyn Grace Loeffler arrived at 12:46 p.m. Monday.

"I'm going great. Fired up," said her daddy, Vikings long snapper Cullen Loeffler, on Tuesday about the 6 pound, 9 ounce, 19-incher delivered by his wife, Jardin. Congrats.

Matchmaking mom Melinda Jacobs has her college-bound son's in-laws all picked out: Frank and Kathie Lee Gifford.

"Cole's going to be 18, so I can't control his future," Jacobs said.

Let's see, trying to pick his wife. Oh, that sounds like a hands-off approach to his future. Jacobs said I just didn't understand: "These kids go back a long way and if Cole wants to support Cassidy in the way she's used to, he's going to have to keep his eBay business up."

According to his mom, Cole has become quite the Internet entrepreneur, selling everything from sports memorabilia to the designer dresses of his mom's friends over the Web. His gazillionaire businessman granddaddy, Irwin Jacobs, has got to be proud.

Cole sounds too busy to even have a girlfriend. Still, I asked Jacobs if she was aware that this was something she really couldn't control.

"I know, but Cassidy is so cute," Jacobs said, "and I adore her mom."