This being a family newspaper website, we usually don't lavish precious bytes on stories like this: Miley Cyrus gives a 44-year old movie producer a "pretty intense" lap dance. That has ooky-creepy vibes, and frankly we don't care if it's all over YouTube. She's a kid. She's a child. Sure. you can get hits if you play up the story, but they're all coming from the room in prison where Roman Polanski gets 10 minute a day on the computer. But then you read this:
Key word in the quote: "dad." As the father of a female-type child, I hereby give everyone license to smack me hard in the face with a large muskie if I ever shrug at something like this, or chalk it up to Things Done By Individuals in a Particular Demographic Bracket. I'd like to think I'd call a press conference and announce that my daughter is grounded until she can vote. Billy Ray, I'll write your lines for you: no child of mine is going to lapdance no old dude. Seriously, man: she's made enough money, okay? Any more of this and Robert DeNiro is going to show up with a mohawk and a pistol. You run into Harvey Keitel, you ask him how that turned out.
