Ask Amy: Favor doesn't replace payment

Dear Amy: I mow lawns as a side gig. Several months ago, my lawn mower quit working and one of the people I mow for (the "Smiths") offered to let me use theirs. I accepted their offer, and told them that as long as I used their lawn mower to mow other lawns, I wouldn't charge them for mowing theirs.

A few weeks ago, another client gave me their old lawn mower (they'd gotten a new one). It was a kind gesture that truly filled my heart with hope. Since then, I have not borrowed the Smiths' mower for other lawns, but they asked me to continue using theirs on their lawn, and I agreed.

I've mowed, weed-whacked and cleaned the grass from their property two times now. They thank me and tell me how great it looks ... but they haven't paid me.

I'm trying to figure out a tactful way to ask them for payment. Can you help me find the words?

Amy says: The Smiths were very generous to let you use their mower. But now that that has ended, you need to get them back on a payment schedule.

Contact them by email to say: "Thank you again for lending your mower when I needed it! This generous gesture helped to keep my business going, and I'm very grateful. However, now that I have replaced my mower, I'd like to get you back on a payment schedule. If you'd like me to continue to use your mower for your property, I'd be happy to extend a 20% discount or whatever discount you decide.

"With the discount, the fee for your property would be XX for each mowing and weed cleanup. If you don't want me to use your mower, I'll use my own. If so, the fee reverts to XX. Please let me know which you would prefer, and we'll schedule your next mowing. With regards and much gratitude ... "

Dear Amy: I was on an Alaskan cruise in September. On Sept. 11, there was an announcement at about noon that we would have a minute of silence to commemorate 9/11.

Within a few seconds there was dead silence among the hundreds of people on board.

I was in the dining area. At the table adjacent to me was a family (who were not speaking English) who continued to talk among themselves.

I was tempted to walk over with an image of the World Trade Center on my phone to explain what was going on without speaking. However, I did not do anything but reverently bow my head as the minute passed. They continued to talk during the whole observance.

Should I have taken some action?

And if you are with other excited people and deeply engaged in conversation, you might not notice that others have fallen silent.

I don't think it was necessary for you to flash a photo of this tragedy in order to drive home your point, but approaching the table, making eye contact, and making the universal symbols for "quiet" and "praying" might have alerted the group for the need to pay respect.