While growing up, we're pretty certain that there are four words we never will say, or even think:

"Wow, Mom was right."

For most of us, that bit of ignorance turns to bliss when we recognize the wisdom of the woman who, after all, brought us into this world and thus has a wee stake in how we deal with it.

The realization might occur when we're talking to our children and blurt out something that sounds eerily familiar, or when we've done something she warned against, such as eating too many Twinkies or dating a lawyer.

It can be a sudden "Aha!" moment, or it might gradually sink in after we followed, perhaps begrudgingly, Mom's advice on how to live.

"My mom always subscribed to the idea that you should be nice to people," said Minneapolis native Louie Anderson, a comedian who mentions his family frequently in his routines. "And when I started becoming successful, I at times had a hard time reminding myself of that.

"I was touring with Roseanne. I think we were playing a casino out East, and this guy, he was the underling, came to me and asked me to do a promotional event. I was really tired, but he said that it was important to him, so I did it.

"That guy later ended up booking me for 11 years at Bally's in Las Vegas."

Orazella Anderson's advice -- "an act of kindness will always come back to you" -- paid off, as did motherly guidance for other Minnesotans.

Erin C.B. Thorman, Bloomington"I realized my mom [Kathy] was right one Sunday afternoon in college. I was doing laundry and had to turn every single one of my socks right-side-out before tossing them in the wash. She'd been after me for years about how tossing them in the laundry inside out was a pain and made way more work. And that day, as I did three weeks' worth of laundry -- that's a lot of socks -- I knew what she was talking about."

Gregory Alm, Richfield"All of my friends' families had the money for tasty, ultra-nutritious meals at McDonald's, Burger King, White Castle, Red Barn, Hardee's and other fast-food joints. I felt left out. Our family rarely had the money for that highly prized food. I can remember crying, complaining and refusing to eat my own mother's bland but healthy home-cooked meals.

"During my college years, and for several years afterward, I ate at fast-food joints until I got really sick at some. Today, at 50, I am fully recovered from my junk-food addiction and never eat that garbage anymore. My mother was 100 percent correct all along."

U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann, R-Minn. "I believe I was in seventh grade. My mother [Jane] had always told me to study hard and do well in school. She said it was the one thing in life that can't be taken away from you. Our family was going through a divorce. I saw my mom lose a lot of things in the material world, so I had a real-life example of seeing loss.

"So I really buckled down and did all I could in school. It's the one piece of advice that changed my course in life, a motivation for learning -- not for getting good grades, but for learning. I'm 55, and I've been a lifelong student."

Jessica Foster, Forest Lake"My mom died in 1998, when I was 25. I really started listening to my mom's advice after she was no longer here to give it. She taught me to always do things my own way, to not follow a set pattern, to take my own approach rather than follow what everyone else is doing. I still can hear some of the things she would always say:

"Be nice.

"Be creative.

"Don't call yourself Ms.

"You are who you hang with.

"Avoid men whose last name ends in '-ski.' (OK, maybe that is a product of her generation.)"

Sen. Amy Klobuchar, D-Minn."My mom [Rose] was always telling me that I had to care about music. And I took piano lessons, begrudgingly. I was very good at memorizing things and playing in contests, but never loved it. And then I completely let it go.

"When my daughter [Abigail] was born, Mom really got into this again. Last summer before she died, we went to see her at the nursing home, and the last five minutes in the dining hall, Abigail sang 'Over the Rainbow' in front of everybody. Abigail singing always made her the happiest. It was my moment of realizing that she had truly passed on this gift of appreciation of music."

Eileen A. Scallen, Minneapolis"My Grandmother Eileen passed this down to her daughter Mary [my mother], and she passed it to me. It rests on this maxim: 'Blessed is nothing.' They were not extolling the virtues of poverty; they believed it is best not to become too attached to material things.

"Their wisdom consoled me a few years ago when my house was robbed. I lost the few pieces of costume jewelry my mother left to me when she died. The jewelry had no real monetary value, but I was crushed to lose that connection to my mother. Then I remembered my mother's warning not to cling to things, which can be lost, destroyed or stolen. It was a great comfort to see that no one can steal the wisdom my mother and grandmother left us."

Bill Ward • 612-673-7643

A LIFELONG CONNECTION

Patricia and her daughter Traci Lambrecht are Twin Cities area writers who write mysteries under the pseudonym PJ Tracy.

Traci: "Maybe I was a very tractable child, but she always made a lot of sense to me. I always agreed with her and maybe she programmed me that way; I was her little Stepford child. [Laughs.]

"She always gave me good advice about dating. 'That guy's a jerk.' And I might disagree, but after a while I would realize she was right; he is a jerk. She said all the time, 'Don't date lawyers,' because she worked with lawyers.

"The one thing she always said was, 'Never settle,' and I never did -- and that's why I've never been married." [Laughs.]

Patricia: "It was Traci who was teaching me. I grew up in a rigid home, and we never questioned our parents; it wasn't permitted. So I grew up thinking silly things like if you don't put your child in a T-shirt, they'll die from pneumonia. And Traci went, 'No, it's hot,' and took it off.

"You learn a lot from your kids if you listen. I grew up in a home where it was important what other people thought of us. And she would say, 'No, it's not that important what other people think.' And she was right."

BILL WARD