Gentlemen don't kiss and tell. In other news, Shia LaBoeuf, an actor known for using all the standard vowels in a very short name, says he had an affair with Megan Fox. And there's more!

It's hard to top "ice shavings-selling clown mom," but the article goes on; Shia trashes all his movies as loud dumb things, which they are. More at the link.