At our newsroom morning meeting last Thursday, one of the Strib's entertainment editors said our guy Colin Covert would rather punch himself in the face for 2.5 hours than watch "Batman v Superman" again.
We didn't go. (We haven't yet figured out why those two are mad at each other, actually.) But we did spend too much time this weekend wrestling with a question that started in the newsroom when we heard about Covert's review: Worst sports movie of all-time?
We asked readers on social media and threw the question at sports and movie nerds in the newsroom. The responses:
Another sequel best left unmade
"Caddyshack II", "Ladybugs", "Ed" (a.k.a. "The one with Joey from friends and the chimp, and baseball") -- voters wanted one of those three to win. A baseball-playing monkey and Matt LeBlanc? No one in here saw that -- thankfully, we were all busy in 1996 and didn't step in this beartrap -- but that seems tough to top.
Cool Runnings. (A scene without John Candy)
"Necessary Roughness" (the one with Kathy Ireland), "Juwanna Mann" (the one with Lil' Kim), "The Legend of Bagger Vance", "Cool Runnings" and "The Air Up There" were also popular submissions.
Robby Benson in One on One. (We'll spare you the poster)
We had to look up "One on One", staring the one and only Robby Benson, and the poster included this line: "There comes a time when love stops being a ball and starts being a woman." Do you feel stupider now that you've read that?
All "Rocky" (even "Rocky V") submissions were deleted. Actually, we printed them out just so we could crumple up the paper and throw them away.
At one point we started remembering that Brian Bosworth and Howie Long were in movies once, but we were too scared to Google any of that and deemed it out of scope.
Before we go "Batman v Superman" and get too long and too boring (and too violent?), we'll finish on a positive note: we only received one nomination for a movie made in the past decade. This, from a Twitter response: "Gotta be 'Draft Day' in a landslide right? A repulsive movie on pretty much every level."
Kevin Costner in Draft Day (Pensive look)
(Poor, Kevin Costner. He aces "Bull Durham," "Tin Cup" and "Field of Dreams" but lands on this list with "Draft Day.")
So that means we are getting better at making sports movies, right? It would seem so. Maybe we should leave the superheroes in the toy box and starting making more sports movies. Somebody must know how to make "Moss v Garnett."
We've missed some, we're sure of it. Please tell us about the classics we have (purposefully?) forgotten in the comments below.