Oh, Jessica, did you ... have something done?
The National Enquirer recently speculated, with photos and commentary from a Michigan plastic surgeon, that Jessica Lange has undergone plastic surgery that didn't necessarily result in a change for the better.
"It's absolutely not true," Lange's PR rep Carrie Gordon told me from NYC on Tuesday. "And Jessica will not comment on it because it's not true."
In our first conversation, before Gordon presumably contacted Lange to say I was seeking a comment, Carrie asked how I could write this after admitting that I'm a huge fan of Jessica's work. Because I'm not blind?
The Enquirer asked Detroit-area plastic surgeon Dr. Tony Youn to analyze before and after photos of Lange and her "Bonneville" co-star Joan Allen, who has suspiciously smooth skin.
Youn gave the Enquirer precise observations about Lange's "overly arched brows," and unnatural Catwoman-like appearance.
But haven't Lange's eyes always had a cat-like quality?
"To an extent she has," said Youn when I interviewed him. "Are her eyes a little more tilted than the average person's? Yes. But not to the extent that we see now in her."
Adding the standard disclaimer/reminder: "Now, I didn't do her surgery or anything," the medical authority who writes celebritycosmeticsurgery.blogspot.com, said: "There are a number of changes now that just are not what we would attribute to normal aging changes. Usually as people age the corners of the eyes tilt downward, and they tilt more downward as you get older, not upward."
Months before this Enquirer article, FM107's Lori Barghini was on the air speculating that the plastic surgery Lange may have had made it more difficult to cast her.
Youn agreed: "What type of roles would you give to somebody who obviously looks like she's had plastic surgery? She can't play country mom. It's unfortunate because obviously she is trying to make herself look better, and probably trying to go after parts that she feels she is too old to get. Unfortunately it's not the right way to go after it."
Lange has the kind of beauty she should have left in the hands of Mother Nature. When you can act, you're more than youthful looks. I'm blaming Sam for what it looks like Lange has done to her face.Aging gracefully
There is no doubt in Lori Barghini's mind that we don't see Jessica Lange in more movies because of her age "and because of what she's done [to her face]. She probably panicked about not getting roles."
Barghini has heard it said in Hollywood that if you get plastic surgery when you're "39, you never have to get it again. You've matured into your face and your bone structure and skin are good. Maybe one of the reasons Jessica Lange doesn't look good is that she waited, maybe. Meryl Streep is getting all the work. I saw her in person, and Meryl Streep hasn't done a thing; she was very lucky with the skin and bones. When she was younger, she was not classically beautiful. Lots of people thought she had too big a nose, but she has grown into her face like Vanessa Redgrave."
I don't know about Redgrave, but supermodel Cheryl Tiegs certainly hit the genes lottery -- though I thought I heard Lori or her sidekick speculating that Tiegs had work done.
"Well, we did and I point-blank asked her on the air and she said no," Barghini said. "She is afraid of needles and she's not injecting anything. She has had her ageless beauty skin care line."
Perhaps Lange's look is the result of not doing as much homework as Glenn Close did before she took what looks like the plastic surgery plunge.
"Or she [Lange] had the unlucky stroke of being with the good plastic surgeon on the day he sucked. That's one of the risks of doing things elective," said Barghini, who should know. In spring 2007, I had the friends-don't-let-friends-get-too-much-Botox conversation with Lori. She claimed she'd backed off the needle, before I told her things were looking scary.Craig Peeps show
Somebody has illustrated in Peeps Idaho Sen. Larry Craig's "wide stance."
The controversial confectionery entry is a finalist in the 2008 Washington Post's Peeps Diorama, similar to one that took a prize in the PP's contest. According to MSNBC's Chris Matthews on "Hardball" -- I just love a good double entendre my editors can't edit out -- the contest threw more than 800 entries.
"Take a look at this semifinalist," said Matthews on Monday, "which shows Larry Craig in action, if he were, in fact, made of marshmallows."
Now, that sounds like a Viagra situation.
C.J. is at 612.332.TIPS or firstname.lastname@example.org. E-mailers, please state a subject -- "Hello" doesn't count. More of her attitude can be seen on FOX 9 Thursday mornings.