A story about Billy Graham goes something like this: In 1949 or 1950, after one of his famous evangelistic meetings, Graham returned to his hotel room to find a naked woman lying on his bed, ready to seduce him in an attempt to destroy his ministry. Graham, cautious and humble as usual, fled the hotel room and immediately implemented a rule that would come to bear his name: From that day forward, Graham would not travel (including by car), eat or meet alone with a woman other than his wife, Ruth.
The Billy Graham Rule was soon adopted by evangelical pastors and business executives. Men in positions of influence wanted to "flee from sexual immorality" and be "above reproach" (both biblical commands), as well as abstain from "every appearance of evil." Aware of how many Christian leaders have been felled by sexual immorality, many of these men were taking sincere steps to guard their marriages from infidelity and their hearts from lust.
Recently, a Washington Post article about second lady Karen Pence has brought the Billy Graham Rule back into the public eye. The article cites a 2002 interview with Vice President Mike Pence — who has called himself an "evangelical Catholic" — saying that he "never eats alone with a woman other than his wife," and that he doesn't attend events serving alcohol unless she is with him.
This will, no doubt, sound strange to the uninitiated. The Onion parodied the story with the headline: "Mike Pence Asks Waiter To Remove Mrs. Butterworth From Table Until Wife Arrives."
It is strange, as are many religious practices. And strange isn't necessarily bad.
The impulse that led to the Billy Graham Rule — which was actually a solidification of principles guarding against several kinds of temptation — is an honorable one: to remain faithful to one's spouse and to avoid the kind of behavior (or rumors) that have destroyed the careers of church leaders. Evangelical pastors having affairs is so common as to almost be cliché and damages the integrity of the church.
But good intentions do not always produce helpful consequences. In this case, the Billy Graham Rule risks reducing women to sexual temptations, objects to be avoided. It perpetuates an old boys club mentality, excluding women from important work and career conversations.
There are good reasons for pastors not to meet behind closed doors with someone of the opposite sex. For the sake of transparency, it can be a wise decision to choose to meet, say, at a coffee shop or with an open-door policy. But for men to categorically refuse to meet one-on-one with women is often dehumanizing and denies the image of Christ that each person bears. As the philosopher Dallas Willard wrote in "The Spirit of the Disciplines," "Alienation from makes room for harmful lusts." It also fuels the myth that loads of women are waiting around to falsely accuse powerful men of rape, a situation that has occurred, but is rare and often used to discount real sexual trauma.
