He offended Wild fans last week. This time, he's going to try to offend movie fans. It's commenter Rocket with his weekly feature. Rocket?
The 1986 Best Picture Oscar went to Platoon, Oliver Stone’s semi-autobiographical account of his time in Vietnam, best known today at the gateway drug for a winner with tiger blood and a warlock brain. This was an unmitigated travesty as the best picture that year was obviously Youngblood, the tour-de-force about a young, gifted hockey player who didn’t want to have to fight to play the game he loved. Youngblood is the second-greatest hockey movie ever made, thus making it the second-greatest movie ever made. Unfortunately, the Rob Lowe-Patrick Swayze vehicle had to wait 24 years and undergo a few modest, cosmetic changes before it won the Oscar it so richly deserved.
“Wait a minute,” you might be saying to yourself. “Didn’t The King’s Speech just win the 2010 Oscar for best picture?” Yes, it did. But what your non-warlock brain obviously doesn’t realize is that they are THE SAME [REDACTED] MOVIE!
Don’t believe me? Since you need proof consider this comparison of the two films:
The King’s Speech: An otherwise talented member of the royal family is burdened by not being particularly proficient at speaking, a major component of his position.
Youngblood: An otherwise talented member of a Canadian junior team is burdened by not being particularly proficient at fighting, a major component of his position.
The King’s Speech: Stuttering, the unavoidable obstacle standing between King George VI and greatness that will make the protagonist face his greatest fear.
Youngblood: Racki, the unavoidable obstacle standing between Dean Youngblood and greatness who will make the protagonist face his greatest fear.
The King’s Speech: A crafty, veteran speech therapist who helps King George VI adjust to a new world with more expectations than he bargained for.
Youngblood: A crafty, veteran forward who helps Dean Youngblood adjust to a new world with more expectations than he bargained for.
Preparation for the Resolution
The King’s Speech: A rigorous training regimen of voice exercises and tongue twisters to prepare King George VI to face his greatest enemy.
Youngblood: A rigorous training regimen of boxing and strength training to prepare Dean Youngblood to face his greatest enemy.
The King’s Speech: With the stakes at their highest, King George VI faces a major wartime speech and does a great job despite his previous limitations, inspiring everyone in England.
Youngblood: With the stakes at their highest, Dean Youngblood faces Racki and knocks him out despite his previous limitations, inspiring everyone in the arena.
There you have it. THEY ARE THE SAME MOVIE. CASE CLOSED. After a few minor changes Youngblood finally won the Oscar it so richly deserved nearly a quarter of a century earlier.