We thought the A.J. Pierzynski "rally beer" story was the best offshoot of today's Boston Globe piece on the Red Sox until we saw this from the Palm Beach Post: If the allegations are true, it wasn't the first time [Josh] Beckett killed time in the clubhouse during a game. He and Brad Penny did that with the Marlins in 2003, prompting manager Jack McKeon to lock the clubhouse door during games.

Jack even resorted to keeping a stack of bathroom passes in the dugout to give out during games when players had to go.

"In between innings they'd go to the clubhouse to get a drink or hang out,'' McKeon recalled this afternoon from his home in North Carolina.

"I said, 'Hey, I got no rule against going up if you have to go to the bathroom or something, but get back.' A couple of times I looked down the bench to talk to somebody and they weren't there. They were in the clubhouse. So I went up and got them out and said, 'OK, boys that's it. We'll lock the door.'"

McKeon told that same story in June, after he took over as Marlins manager when Edwin Rodriguez resigned. In June, McKeon was a little more animated in his recollection of what he did in 2003: "I would go in clubhouse with bat and (say) 'get your [redacteds] out of here!' I locked the clubhouse."

McKeon recalled in June how he handed out what he called "poo-poo cards and pee-pee cards. Put them where I was sitting (in the dugout), so if you wanted to go to bathroom you had to get a card. That broke it up."

We're fairly certain that in poker, a poo-poo-high flush beats almost anything.