We present without comment this e-mail from an actual reader. We will only say that the jacket part is not true (OK, none of it is true), show you where, initially, the e-mail was cut off before being resumed via a second e-mail and clean up a bit of the language:
That is my cool jacket on Davey K in your very unfunny Quantum Leap column. He borrowed it from me outside the lobby of the Timberwolves office a couple years back. I asked him for change and he was in this big hurry on the way to a "big" interview. I said: "Man, you look like a dorky unemployed architect in that lame turtleneck and 'dress slacks' (his words ). I tell you what. You need some good advice, 'cause I live downtown and know the place. See I had moved from Chicago the previous fall on account of some of my associates wrongfully accusing me of skimming the profits off our fruit roll-up thong shipments out of Peoria.
Anyway, I hooked him up with the jacket because he was nervous. I just told him to use his most ambitious sounding vocabulary words at this here interview and that he'd be fine. "That's the way everyone talks in Minneapolis. You know, just use words that are big even if they don't fit the moment because everyone's trying to impress everybody here.' He told me to give him an example and I told him I couldn't think of any, so I just told him to "make the words up and arch one eyebrow just a little and the man'll get the idea that you know something. Just take little words and put them together like, for instance, the next thing I'm gonna' do with the 50 bucks you gave me is pusome fancy underwear for my gal.
--- This is where it was initially cut off, which made it very strange --
So Michael, I hit the send button before I could finish this here story about my jacket. I apologize. Anyways, I say to this guy Kahnsie, the next thing I'm gonna' do with the 50 bucks you gave me for my coat is buy my girl something nice at one of the girlie shops downtown. And I say I'm gonna "buy for Kate something sexy. So I say, 'Say it man - buy for kate'". And he says it back to me and it sounds amazing, like it's actually a real world. And right then and there, the light bulb goes on, he gets it. He even made up a different spelling like 'b-i-f-u-r-c-a-t-e' or something. A few months down the line, I hear this sports guy, Reusse, using the word on the radio like it actually MEANS something. And now this Kahn guy is in charge of a basketball team. He's lucky he met me.
Now was that really worth reading? Sorry I had to put you through that, Michael. The graphics on the Quantum Leap column was fantastic and so was the column itself. Great stuff!
So there you have it.