Your teenager wants a summer job that will last through fall, but you want her to focus on academics when school resumes. What to do?

Score one for the teen.

"Parents should definitely entertain the idea if a teenager is demonstrating interest in a job, because of all the positives," says Jennifer Powell-Lunder, child and adolescent psychologist and author of "Teenage as a Second Language."

Positives include better money management, lessons in punctuality, mastering a new skill set and, believe it or not, enhanced academic performance -- as long as they don't work too much.

"We know that teens who work under 15 hours a week really have to learn how to manage their time and it actually structures them, which encourages better grades," she says.

Points to keep in mind:

Let them test the waters. "More and more kids are looking to get jobs related to what they think they want to do after college," Powell-Lunder says. "It can have a positive effect and encourage them to continue to pursue that field, or it can help them rule out something that might not be a good fit for them."

Mind their money. "It's really important for parents to help kids mediate what to do with the money they earn -- put some away for college, keep some for activities." Better to learn the skills while they're still living at home and you can steer them away from the pitfalls.

Watch stress levels. "Teens can experience mental health issues if they're working more than 15 hours a week. The types of jobs teens are able to get tend to be boring and repetitive. That can eat away at their self-esteem if they're doing the same thing over and over for too many hours."

CHICAGO TRIBUNE

Discipline over soccer was right callQ Of late, our 8-year-old daughter has not been completing chores and following directions. On the morning of a recent soccer game, she again failed to follow some simple directions.

On the way to the game, I calmly told her that when we arrived, she would tell her coach she was unable to play because she had not followed her parents' directions at home. She balked, so I told her that either she obeyed or she would miss the remainder of the soccer season. She complied, and we went home, where she sulked before ultimately realizing that it was better to follow directions.

Was I too harsh? Some of my friends seem to think so.

A Your friends are jealous that you are able to do what they cannot bring themselves to do: discipline their children with purpose. They envy you, but are unable to admit their envy (also known as "denial"). They wish you would not be a constant reminder to them of their weakness.

Never surrender to their pressure. Keep up the good work!

Perhaps through your good example you will eventually rescue one or two of them from the belittling confines of the "Good Mommy Box."

Concerning what you did: There is no point to a consequence if it does not produce a permanent memory. Your daughter will tell this story to her grandchildren someday. More immediately, and as you have witnessed, this experience has greatly contributed to her rehabilitation.

JOHN ROSEMOND, FAMILY PSYCHOLOGIST, CHARLOTTE (N.C.) OBSERVER