Rather than rant, it feels like the right time to trot out some baseball haiku, which happens a couple of times every season in Section 219 and carries on a fine tradition started here. You know the drill: Three lines; five syllables in the first line followed by seven in the second and five in the third.
I'm on vacation this week, so blogging will be minimal and you'll just have to add your own haiku in the comments to keep things fresh.
Haiku isn't necessary, of course, but it beats the same old same old.
Didn't watch much Sunday / Instead we shopped for vacuums / They're supposed to suck.
Went to first two games/ Seeing reunion Twins rocked / Watching games did not
Sox swept by Yankees / Sox come here and sweep the Twins / Still doubting it's over?
Mauer at third base / That was mentioned by Gardy / You hear that, Danny?
More errors than runs / Makes for three terrible games/ Flat for no reason
Fans still boo A.J. / I understand why they do / But Twins need an a$$
That pitcher named Slowey / He's been fine in Rochester / Time to bring him up
Blackburn and Duensing / They should leave the rotation / Start Swarzak as well
If you're Cuddyer / You would test the market too / Don't begrudge him that
Mauer's OBP / Right now it's three-three-seven / Punto's is higher
Something positive / Jason Kubel's hitting lefties / I'd keep him here
If you're management / Off-season will be telling / Be good or be gone