It's kind of reassuring that no matter how politically correct the world might get, there's still one group that it's OK to make fun of:
Douchebags.
There are websites and T-shirts about these obnoxious heathens, and no doubt there will be Halloween revelers with the shirt-pulled-up, moronic-hand-signal-waving, smirky-sneer look. And now, of course, there's a book. "The Quotable Douchebag: A Treasury of Spectacularly Stupid Remarks" ($13, Quirk) unspools some of the dimmest, gauchest utterances from this lunkheaded lot.
There are a whole lot of egomanaical action-movie stars -- Jean Claude Van Damme calls himself "the Fred Astaire of karate" -- plus Baldwin brothers, billionaires and, of course, politicians like John McCain: "Do you know why Chelsea Clinton is so ugly? It's because Janet Reno is her father."
And we thought his "Bomb Iran/Barbara Ann" joke/song was dunderheaded.
"Douchebag" is a fun, breezy read, and serial offenders such as Danny Bonaduce, Don Imus and Spencer Pratt get their own pages for their multiple gaffe attacks. In the name of gender equity, there's a "Douchebaguettes" section in the back that includes the likes of Leona Helmsley ("We don't pay taxes. Only the little people pay taxes.")
But Douchebaggery is mostly a man's world, so we'll leave you with this gem from the inimitable David Hasselhoff:
"There are many dying children out there whose last wish is to meet me."
BILL WARD
