Favorite story of the day: Lindsay Lohan's mother used her daughter's special free-ice-cream card, and the clerk confiscated it. Mom flips. Cops are summoned. You can read the RadarOnline version, but it seems to be written in a style for people who find twitter messages too long and taxing to read in one sitting, or the CNN version. The kicker to the story? Carvel Ice Cream has issued a press release to tell its side of the story, as if worried there will be a public backlash against them for being mean to America's First Family of Hollywood:

The Radar piece has this quote from Mother Lohan, which sums up everything we love about these wacky, fun-lovin' folks:

Perhaps because you're sub-regular?