Last Night's "24"

This has been the best "24" season in years. I was initially suspicious, because it seemed like an underwhelming McGuffin (rods! We have to secure the rods!) and they didn't dare say the Islamic Republic of the Republic of Islam was Iran. Turns out it was Pakistan. Iran wouldn't accept a woman as the President, but Pakistan had a run of Bhuttos that included the female variety, so there's a precedent.

Oh, you have to get past some ridiculousness, as usual, including Jack's amazing self-sealing intestinal wall, but it's been good. Some highlights follow. All times are approximate. Don't go back and search through the show to match up the comment with the time. That would be pathetic.

10:07 Well, finally: Dana's taken off to an "undisclosed location" and waterboarded. I hope they use conditioner; she's looking greasy.

10:11 Behold, Michael Madsen! With his reputation and Troubled History, he's back on TV? This has the aroma of Keif doing a pal a favor, but when you check imdb you see Madsen has lots of work lined up. If Jack's going rogue - as opposed to the by-the-book, fill-out-all-the-proper-forms-in-triplicate kind of guy he's always been, I mean - then he'll need someone. A Felix Leiter to his Bond.

10:32 Chloe rolls her eyes and expresses exasperated contempt better than any runway model could ever do. When models do it, you sense they're irritated because Serge didn't come to the dressing room with the mineral water and cigarettes fast enough. When Chloe rolls her eyes, it's because people are not using technology to save Western Civilization FAST ENOUGH and she could do it faster if they'd just let her open up another socket.

10: 36 God bless Ethan. Has a heart attack, comes back a few hours later in fine aide-fettle, makes a case - you know he reserves calling her "Alison" for those special moments - then steps aside, because there's another man. Alllllison / I know Logan is fooling you / whoa oh oh Allllison / Bauer's aimed at you

Love this line: "Keeping the evidence from Jack Bauer is one thing, Madame President." Yes, cross that line at your peril. He's going to find a way to shimmy down the chimney and hold her at gunpoint until she admits the Russians were behind this, and he'll make such a strong case the Secret Service guys will look at each other in confusion. You know, he's got a point.

10:50 Jack has disarmed the best CTU has to offer, and done it with half a postage stamp, the wing of a beetle, and three small pebbles. Then he lays it out for Freddy P-Junior:You protected a traitor you were boinking, and got four of your men shot today, so: interested in some redemption so you can appear in the movie version of this series without the audience hating you? Go ahead, look mad, you should be.

Back at the White House, it's a tense scene between Outgoing Ethan and the corrupting influence of Logan, aka Twitchy McNixon. One would really like to see Ethan kick Logan in the ol' Viagra Beans, if you know what I mean.

10:57 Hello, Dana; welcome to Basement Dental. Have a seat.

10:59 Stay tuned for previews of an all new episode of "24"! Good; I'd worried they were going to replay random episodes from previous seasons next week.