Jose Canseco shot his finger accidentally recently. (There's a sentence we've never typed, but not one that we completely expected to never have to type).

Canseco's mangled finger then fell off during a poker game. (Again, never typed it … but never ruled it out).

But this? this we never imagined: Canseco is planning to sell his severed finger on eBay and also wants it known that he will sell you the gun that did the deed. We're just going to leave these two tweets from Jose right here: