Do you know what that thing over on the right is? Trust me, you will. The merchandising machine is already gearing u to decide which toys will be under the Christmas tree. You weren't under the illusion that these things arose spontaneously and naturally, were you?

Hold on, Green Lantern is the big toy of 2011? Not Thor, not Captain America? Interesting. Cars is still on top? That may have something to do with the decision to make a sequel.

This year's fair is at the Javits center, and if you're thinking it's a big happy time for kids of all ages, no. From the website's FAQ:

That's because people are working. I've been to many Toy Fairs in New York, and believe me, you don't want kids running around, handling things, interrupting the product demonstrations. They'd ask stupid questions like "How much does it cost?" instead of "What's the price point?"

Javits is great, but I miss the old building. The Toy Fair used to have the main action on 23rd and 5th; Mattel and other big hitters set up in in the old department stores on 23rd and everyone else piled into the old 200 5th Avenue building. The elevators were slow and small; the buyers often had a few expense-account pounds hanging around the belt, and were not interested in climbing up ten stories to get to a showroom. Result: the elevators were constantly packed. Stopped at every floor. Eventually the buyers would give up and use the stairs, pausing every so often to wheeze and mop up the sweat. and lean against the wall and wait for the radiating chest pains to stop. Oh, it was a wonderful time. I'm convinced everyone who had a showroom on the top floor went bankrupt.

It's not just the big guys who attend the show, it's the mom-and-pop import shops, the entrepreneurs who think they have the next Groovy Girl. I miss it. One year our group got to meet the guy who does the voice for Elmo. Can you imagine having that job? No one would believe you. They'd just think you did a really good Elmo.